Your Negative Feelings are Sending a Coded Message

What if you decide to listen to them instead of ignoring or, even worse, suppressing them?

  • Struggling a bit today?
  • Did you receive some bad news?
  • Are you grieving a relationship or loss of any kind?
  • Are you feeling physically weak or emotionally drained?
  • Are you tired of your job search, and of constantly applying without being called for an interview?
  • Do you feel worried about securing some income for your family?

All of those elements are understandable and shared by all human beings at some point in their lives. We are no different, folks.

What is different from a person to another, though, is how we manage this very legitimate unease. Some feelings have such a bad reputation that most people tend to believe they need to suppress them.

The truth is you don’t. As long as they are real feelings — not perceived ones, we rather need to honor and go through them so that we can process them in a healthy way.

You might want to be aware of the difference between your emotions and feelings, though:

Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose.

~Viktor Frankl

Emotion is the physical signal your body is sending as an answer to a stimulus. Your feeling is the translation of your emotion by your subconscious program.

If your program is unfriendly, it’s more likely that your anger ‘emotion’ will be converted into an anger ‘feeling’; thus, an impulsive behavior, given that you still have many abuse flashbacks making your emotional regulation almost impossible.

The more you rewire your invasive subconscious program — that is destroying your limiting beliefs and micro-trauma constructs, the more you enlarge the gap between the external stimulus and your response. Hence, you become an observer of your own participation. You would feel anger at first. Then, it would transform into pity and you would move on with your business peacefully.

Give yourself the permission to stay with your ‘negative’ feeling. In parallel, take a break from everything and everyone, and practice some self-care. There is no contradiction at all.

By self-care, I don’t mean salt baths or chocolate massages. There is absolutely nothing wrong with them per se.

Nonetheless, they will not be the right option when you want to process your feelings; rather a distraction that would only postpone emotional chaos.

The right people will always understand your healthy boundaries and honor them!


Myriam Ben Salem
Myriam Ben Salem
I am deeply passionate about everything life has to offer. Writing has been my very favorite means to educate my audience, captivate their attention, talk to their emotions, and make them relate and take action. I have been honored by working as a columnist for BIZCATALYST 360°, an Award-Winning life, culture, and biz new media digest, serving as the global hub for enhanced performance and well-being, during 2020. Also, I am a contributing author in Mayhem to Miracles: True Stories of Courage, Triumph, and Peace. I am so in love with writing that I have a peaceful smile drawn on my face whenever I start visualizing the books I will be writing for whoever will be tempted to discover an inclusive philosophy breaking with all the stigmas! I was born in Tunisia, a small country in North Africa. I did pretty much everything earlier than the average: walking, talking, singing, dancing. Promoted throughout my entire education, I was also the leader of every end-of-year party. At some point, after working several years for multinational companies as an engineer, team leader, project coordinator, and product owner while always being a top performer, I figured out I was feeling miserable despite the 'perfect external image'. That marked the starting point of an existential crisis followed by an episode that triggered my re-birth and the beginning of the most rewarding adventure of my whole existence: re-writing my subconscious program and reconnecting with my true self. I was saved at the last moment through an out-of-body experience making me see all the lies, realize this gigantic Universe was not revolving around me. Most importantly, I was able to visualize I was here to leave a legacy like all of you, no matter how big or small! The butterfly took time to emerge though. Today, I identify myself as a Universal Citizen. Like-minded and light-hearted people are what I call home. I am deeply passionate about everything life has to offer, and was granted the edutainer qualifier: a combination between education and entertainment! I educate on the importance of healing unsuspected traumas, seeing our limiting beliefs and biases with honest lenses, finding one's purpose and a principled mission that goes beyond the self, and unleashing the hidden potential so that to leave our legacy for the generations unborn. I have been using a panoply of means that could vary from explicit ones such as mentorship, speaking, and writing, a skill that emerged naturally during my self-actualization process to implicit mediums like storytelling, how I daily show up in the world and model servant leadership! Writing is my very favorite and most preferred tool deployed for my mission. The topics I explore are in the nexus of stoic philosophy, psychology, neuroplasticity, epigenetics, and pretty much any topic involving human behavior. Common denominator? The quality of the subconscious program. You may have a look at some of my works published on my website; Set Yourself Free.

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  1. I posted a comment, but disappeared dear Myriam.

    I agree with you and the theme of your post. In particular “Give yourself the permission to stay with your ‘negative’ feeling. In parallel, take a break from everything and everyone, and practice some self-care. There is no contradiction at all.”

    In my next post on BIZCATALYST “Sinking in the Sand of Sadness” explanation of the validity of your post is provided. If we do not pause and think the next move we may even go deeper in the sand of sadness and grief.