Why Love is the Opposite of Fear

–and how to replace humanity’s huge fear with unconditional love

Would you agree with me, if I said that all of our past and present problems come from fear?

Where do wars come from? They come from fear. Fear of scarcity first of all –  you might call it greed, but that’s just an exacerbated fear of scarcity. And  fear of the unknown, the unfamiliar.

Where does racism come from? Fear again. And bullying? And sexism? And religious fanaticism? Fear, fear, fear! We’re scared of death, but we’re equally scared of life.

We’re scared someone else might be stronger than us, better looking, smarter, richer, more successful, more loved… We’re scared of other people’s opinions, we’re scared of putting on weight, of getting dumped by our spouse, of getting betrayed by our friends, we’re scared of the opposite sex, of speaking in public, of being ridiculed, rejected, fired….

That’s a tough, grim life. Fear destroys our spirit and our body. It weakens our immune system, lowers our intelligence, our overall capabilities, it makes our heart and mind race, it makes us fall off track, deprives us of all joy, all hope, all confidence.

Imagine if we knew no fear. How would we go through life? I’m not talking about being reckless of course, we don’t want to do silly things and injure ourselves or others. I’m talking about knowing, understanding, deep in our hearts, that all’s well – even if it doesn’t always look like it is.

Imagine if we were able to appreciate others for what they are, and respect them and their life journey as if it were our own. Because you see, chances are, their life journey actually IS our own.

Please bear with me for another few lines, before you call me a fool and leave these pages.

I’ve been to the place where we all come from. It’s a beautiful place. And I believe that everyone should go there a few times in their lives.

Are you still with me?

The place I’m talking about is where we go when we’re not busy living one of our lives over here. Yes, we do live many lives, we do incarnate many times, and the memory of all these lives is stored in our brain, in places that we get less and less used to accessing after the age of 5. Small children often remember things from their previous lives and talk about it, and we might think it’s all fantasy… but they’re sometimes recalling things from their past.

When we go to school in the West, we almost exclusively develop our analytical, rational mind, the one that controls speech, writing, abstract thinking, mathematics; the one that’s used for absorbing data, filing information, translating it into different codes and languages, the one we use for all practical purposes. So we lose touch with our subconscious and unconscious mind more and more, and just forget how to access it. This part of our mind is related to emotions, creativity, out-of-the-box thinking, inspiration, and to everything spiritual and also dreamlike.

But an experienced hypnotherapist can help us unlock this part of ourselves.

It’s nothing woo-woo or magical, nothing to do with superstition or special powers only a few people have. We have so many memories, that are very important – although hidden –  part of us all, of our lives, of who we are. In order to access them, we need to enter our unconscious[1] mind, and this is done by lowering the electrical activity of our brain.

The energy level our brain is at when we are awake is called the Beta state. Here our waves have an average frequency of around 22 cycles per second. When we calm our brain waves down in the direction of sleep (called the Delta state, with an average frequency of around 2 cycles per second) we go through two more electrical activity levels, the Alpha state, at around 10 cycles and the Theta state, at around 6 cycles per second. The Theta state is where we get to access our unconscious mind.

Now, with someone experienced guiding us there and talking to us, we won’t fall asleep, and we’ll experience this much lower energy level of our mind while remaining awake. That’s why, when we’re doing a hypnosis session, we are perfectly aware of everything around us, and we will remember everything when we come back to our waking Beta state. We can stay there for as long as we need to, so we can follow our memories back and forth, and look for clues and answers to our questions. These sessions typically last a few hours.

The memories from our other lives are no different than the ones from this life. They’re not any stronger or weaker, they’re just another set of our own memories. And we see ourselves as us, but with a different name, maybe different gender, maybe living in a different culture, and usually living in a different time. We see some people we recognise straightaway. Some of our nearest and dearest have already shared some other lives with us. Maybe our mother in this life was our husband before, our best friend was our sister, our mentor was our kid. Sometimes our spouse has been our spouse a few times before, sometimes with switched genders for one or both of us.

It’s amazing when you’re a middle-aged woman as I am now, for example, experiencing yourself again as a small child, but somewhere else, a totally different childhood. Or experiencing yourself as an old woman and seeing the moment of your death, which by the way, is an amazingly beautiful moment… Or experiencing yourself as a man, in a couple with your same blond husband from this life, only that he was a dark-haired woman that other time.

These are just a few random details (and that’s already amazing enough!) but what absolutely blew my mind was, understanding how everything we do in life, could be done in many different ways as well. At every moment, we are choosing between a series of different turns, and each one of them would take us on a completely different path.

In one of the lives I remembered, I left my country and went abroad looking for a better life. I died rather old, after a very average, uneventful life. Then my hypnotist took me back to the moment I decided to leave and asked me to look at how my life would have been if I had made the decision to stay in my country instead. I didn’t question that, I just did it, and I saw a shorter and more difficult life, but it was so happy, so fulfilled. I burst out crying and jolted out of hypnosis.

All possibilities are there at all times, all choices can be made, it’s up to us.

I was so confused… how could I see a life I didn’t really live? And how could I get so emotional about it? It really hit me like a storm. And he explained to me that all possibilities are there at all times, all choices can be made, it’s up to us. They’re all equally present, equally likely, equally valid. They’re on parallel timelines. This might sound a bit strange – unless you’re familiar with quantum physics – but they’re all equally real. Do you remember the movie “Sliding Doors”?

“I screwed up there”, I said. He smiled and said, “Well, in a way, you did!” He then got me back under, took me back to the shorter but happier life, and had me ask that “version” of myself what I should take away from that. And the answer came very clear, “don’t run away from things because they look hard!”. Exactly what I needed to hear.

Now imagine for example a chauvinistic white male going back and reliving that time when he was a woman, that other time when he was black, that other time when he was gay; and that rather tough life when he was a woman, and black, and gay, all at the same time, haha! Imagine a rich person experiencing themselves as poor, or the other way round. A bully or a murderer experiencing themselves as a victim, or the other way round. We have all been an artist at some stage, a criminal, a king, a baker, a prostitute, a genius; we’ve been disabled, we got killed in a battle, we’ve been mentally ill, we’ve been a mother of six, we drowned when we were five…

That was – or better, IS! – us, you, me, all the way. And when we really understand this, my bet is that we will become more tolerant and compassionate with all those people we would have thought are not like us… But here’s the thing, everyone on the planet is like us! No one is different from us! They might be playing a different role from ours right now, but it’s all a big game or a big theatre play, and we’ll all play a different role again, next time around.

When we are doing a session of this kind, we’re revisiting our past experiences, no matter if they go back a few years, or a few hundred years, or a few thousand years. In our minds, it’s just one uninterrupted string of memories.

Can you see what this ultimately means? It means that death does not exist.

We do die to people around us, for sure. Exactly like a character in a theatre play who exits the scene at the end of their role. They’ll walk backstage and won’t be seen again, but they’re far from dead! They’ll sit in their dressing room, looking at themselves in the mirror, reflecting on how they played. Some nights they’ll feel fantastic, some other nights they’ll be less pleased with themselves. They might take off their shoes and put their feet up, and think about something new they want to try out next time.


Simona Mango
Simona Mango
Simona is a humanitarian by nature. She genuinely loves human beings and wants them to live in peace, and harmony, and joy. She wants health, and abundance, and growth, and love, for every single one of them. She loves animals and wants them to be respected, she loves nature and wants this wonderful planet to thrive and bloom. She knows that her vision will become reality one day. Here you can visit her community, the Keepers Of mother Earth. She’s a certified spiritual life coach specialising on life purpose, and she guides people on their caterpillar-to-butterfly journey to becoming who they're really meant to be.

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  1. There are many obstacles to overcome before we become more tolerant and compassionate, as you hope in your wonderful post. Prejudice is everywhere, working hard to divide us into different belief systems: Relgious. Political. Socio-Economic etc. Funny but in a lot the science fiction out there, the world has solved all of these problems and is one civilization. In actuality we are one civilization…we are all earthlings. Now if only we could start living that, what a wonderful world it would be.

    • Yes exactly! That’s why I hope – and believe – that concepts like passports, and citizenships, and castes, and classes, and orders, and all the social divisions will disappear sometime in the future. At some stage, they will make no sense anymore. Can’t you see that I’m a human from this planet? So why do I need papers to justify my existence and be allowed to move around the place where I was born? And why should other humans like me have the authority to grant or deny me these papers? But as you say, that’s likely to take a little bit more time…

  2. Simona, welcome to the group! This is such a powerful and insightful read. I personally found these theories hard to wrap my head around till I had my own past life regression; and it is everything you described. Thank you for giving us all an opportunity to dive a little deeper into the possibility of parallel universes! #pastlife #choices

    • Thank you so much Carolyn! I understand, i come from a totally materialistic, scientific-minded, positivist background, where all of this sounds like you’re on heavy drugs… But when I started reading and understanding and seeing for myself, a long series of experiences and intuitions I’d had since childhood, suddenly started to make sense. And so did that little quantum physics my mind is capable of grasping. It was like a switch was flicked. I now divide my life so far into before and after. The before is like cartoons in black and white, the after is like a 3D movie with goggles on…

  3. Wow! Simona, this really had me thinking on another plain of consciousness. We make choices in a split second, in one particular choice, does that mean the other one was actually planned out ready too? The 1989 movie ‘Sliding Doors’ with Gwyneth Paltrow addresses this phenomenon. ‘What if one split second sent your life in two completely different directions?’ Almost a parallel universe. Certainly thought provoking. Quite scary! When someone is hypnotized, do they sometimes speak a foreign language fluently? I have heard of this. Really interesting article, Simona. W

    • It’s so fascinating, Simon. Sometimes it’s a matter of a split second as you say; sometimes it can be decisions that take us years to make; sometimes it can be making no decision, which I believe, is a choice too… And everyone of them is possible and has the potential to unfold. There’s no right or wrong decision, I think. Any road we will take can get us to where we need – not necessarily want – to go. Some will be bumpier, and some smoother for sure!

      Yes, I’ve read about people speaking foreign languages that were their own at some other stage. And I remember a scene, I’m not sure if it was from Brian Weiss, where a Chinese lady went to the session with an interpreter. She then got taken back to a life where she was American, and suddenly started speaking perfect English. The interpreter started automatically translating back into Chinese before he realised what was going on and almost fainted 🙂

  4. Thank you Simona for this fascinating, thought-provoking piece, and welcome again to BizCatalyst. As a hypnotherapist, I do not do past life regression, nor have I ever seen someone spontaneously revert to another time. Saying that, as with many things, I am not adverse to the possibility of having other lives. For me, however, after this life, I hope to go to another life which is not earthly. I liken my life to BlackJack. I am ahead so I will leave the table now.💖

    • Thank you so much Darlene. I can totally relate to what you’re saying! I’m hoping to cram everything I still need to do into this life, and make it my last too. But that’s how I feel now. Who knows what I’ll want and need, and what I’ll agree to do, when the time comes to get ready for the next one… Still, I’m with you there. Much as I deeply love this planet and this life, I’ve been longing for something less earthly for the best part of it!

  5. Simona, Its was amazing reading your article and it echoed in my heart….
    I know there are people around me who “I’ allow to be, so that lessons can be learnt; I carry bleeding scars on my soul for perhaps I invited the wounds….. Then all of a sudden I meet someone with a beautiful soul and this song churns out from the pit of my stomach:
    Past lives couldn’t ever hold me down – Lost love is sweeter when it’s finally found – I’ve got the strangest feeling – This isn’t our first time around !
    ( I have seen myself in two Lifestimes in a Past Life Regression- always fighting on battlefields for pride and dignityu of countries…and in this one I chose to face waging wards from near and dear ones, invoking closings…for may i have hurt them in another) !

    • I love this, Minku. It’s so important to become aware of what we’re here to do. It can happen to us that we just wander through life for some time, reacting to everything that happens to us, and wonder why it’s happening. And if we see no reason for things, it can be overwhelming. But when we start to see where we’re coming from and where we need to go, it all starts to make sense. I believe we came here with a purpose. And of course, we need to complete quite a few tasks on the way, some of which are closings, as you say. Beautiful!

  6. Beautiful essay, Simona. I’m very much “on your page,” so to speak. I have had past live regressions and have learned details that have helped to explain the way I live in this world. I fully believe that when we incarnate our soul has signed a contract. Members of our soul family agree to play certain roles. I know my ex-husband agreed to play the villain in my life and because of this, I learned a ton (mostly very hard-earned lessons). I know I taught him as well.

    • Thank you Carol! Yes, I fully agree with everything you say. Sometimes we’ll have a few members of our soul family over here, sometimes just one, and I’ve read reports from people who decided to come over here on their own. So far, I only met one soul of my own bunch – my ex-husband too 🙂 but not as a villain. And another soul I already shared at least one life with, who’s my husband now as I mention in the article, but he’s from a different family. It was amazing getting a confirmation of this feeling I had long before I knew anything about past life regression. And oh yes, we do learn so much from each other…

    • Thank you so much for your kind words Maria ❤️ I think this community can do a lot for the bigger community, and I’m very happy to get a chance to contribute to something great.