Why is Change so Challenging? 

I think this is an easy one to answer —we need to step out of our known familiar and think, be and do something different. Before we can do this, our protective Ego steps up to the podium in its effort to keep us safe.

Ego = safe??? I hear you ask!!

Yes, one of the most significant roles of Ego is to keep us safe from re-experiencing painful, confronting, hurtful, scary, or dangerous situations again.   So, when we start to do things differently, even thinking about it, the Ego will step in and tell us all the reasons why we shouldn’t, mustn’t, can’t, not for me, don’t, etc.

We have all heard these voices or notions in our mind/gut, and they seem to get louder when we share the vision with others who have similar beliefs and fears.

The biggest challenge is to get out of our way – explore with Ego their fears concerns and the reasons why they believe we can’t, shouldn’t, mustn’t do things differently. With this insight and awareness, we can choose from loving empowerment.

We have the opportunity to question ancient and disempowering ideas of what is suitable and acceptable. Are they still relevant? Are they relevant to you now?

Explore other ways of thinking, feeling, being, and choosing. We can make different choices, but first, we need to heal and let go of the fears presented by the Ego.

Fighting the Ego with “fake it till you make it’, “Just do it!’, staying in the status quo, and pushing through is what causes the agitation, anxiety, frustration, insecurity etc.

By talking with the Ego, the younger you that is running scared and telling you the reasons why, helping this part of your psyche see you can make different decisions, you have been doing this all your life, that you are capable, you are important, loved. Lovable etc., you are starting to dismantle the Ego’s fears and limiting beliefs.

This takes time, courage, being open to new possibilities, seeing beyond the limitations and a choice to learn, asking for help, and taking the first steps towards doing thoughts and actions differently.

You are responsible for your life, and how you create and manage this, so it makes sense to heal the past wounds that are holding you back. Fill them with the love and compassionate insight needed to become stronger, from a more authentic, deeper place of choice and love that empowers change from your highest good.

This is a journey not easily done by one’s self. Not because you can’t, but because, like all travel’s into new lands, you don’t know what you don’t know and the nuances or requirements to navigate the new spaces you are exploring.

This is where travelling/working with a trauma-informed counsellor can do wonders. We are like the local tour guide who can take you to the best and safest spaces to create the adventure to your specifications and add a few hidden areas along the way.


Leah Marmulla
Leah Marmulla
Leah is a Personal Change Agent, an Author and loves to see others make empowered authentic choices. Creating alife on their Terms with confidence, self-confidence. Leah's mission is quite simply to help others take steps to walk their life journey. To teach, support, and share my knowledge around reducing the hold limiting beliefs and fears have in one's life. Enabling empowered choices to make choices based on consciously selected beliefs, values, and character traits. Philosophy: We have four primary 'parts' creating our life experiences. The mind and its ability to create links in the world and therefore 'think'. The body that moves and interacts in the world. Spirit or energy is noticed in our character, values, actions. Then the soul is our core and links us to divinity. Over time, our life experiences have created layers. Each layer either lifted us up or weighed us down, either reinforcing our beliefs or helping to loosen their hold over our lives. There are many ways in which life dampens our innate joy and peace. An unkind word, frightening experiences, cultural norms that devalue or make others less than. Often the result is we start to believe "I am not good enough at....."; "I must have ...... before I even can consider being happy, or fulfilled" etc. According to psychologists, our beliefs, by their very nature, frame our outlook on life, interactions with others, quality of life, workplace, and impact in our love relationships, family, and most importantly, ourselves.

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