The only thing more precious than time is who we spend it with.
—Leo Christopher
In the hustle of our daily lives, we often forget the fragility of our existence. We take for granted the presence of those who bring light to our world, assuming they’ll always be there. But what if they weren’t? What if today was your last chance to express your love and appreciation for someone who means the world to you?
A while back, I witnessed a heart-wrenching scene at a colleague’s funeral. The air was thick with grief and regret as coworkers tearfully proclaimed their love for the deceased. It was a stark reminder that sometimes, we wait until it’s too late to voice our deepest feelings. This experience sparked a personal revolution. I made a vow to never again hesitate in expressing my love and appreciation for those who matter to me. It’s not just about saying “I love you,” but also acknowledging the profound impact someone has on your life. It’s about letting them know they give your existence meaning and purpose.
Think about the people in your life right now. Your family, friends, mentors, or even that colleague who always brightens your day. Have you told them recently how much they mean to you? Have you expressed your gratitude for their presence in your life?
Life is unpredictable. We’re not guaranteed tomorrow. That text you’ve been meaning to send, that call you’ve been putting off, that heartfelt conversation you’ve been avoiding – don’t wait. Today is the day to reach out, to open your heart, to let your loved ones know they’re cherished.
Don’t let fear or discomfort hold you back. The momentary awkwardness of expressing your feelings pales in comparison to the potential regret of leaving things unsaid. Your words of love and appreciation could be the light that someone desperately needs in their darkest hour.
So, I challenge you: Make today the day you speak up. Tell someone you love them. Express your admiration. Share your gratitude. Because in the end, it’s not the things we do that we regret most, but the things we leave unsaid.
Remember, you might not have tomorrow to say, “I love you.” Don’t wait until it’s too late.
Editor’s Note: Enjoy our evolving Exploring Our Shared Humanity Series HERE
The reasons for the substantial difficulty in expressing gratitude and affection can be many. It even seems that we play at not showing what we like, at not throwing ourselves in for fear of rejection, at waiting for the other to tell us what they feel and then we say it accordingly.
And instead, kindness and gratitude, affection in the tone, in the ways of doing, and in the words chosen to say thank you, I love you, is good for those who express it, because to do it from the heart we must tune into our positive feelings: by doing so, we are the first to benefit from the smile we give, the hug that warms the heart, the gift we choose, the letter that gives us joy to write.
And they are, certainly, for those who receive it: everyone, at every level, needs to feel appreciated, to exist in the gaze, in the attention, in the positive evaluation of others, which make us feel that we exist at work, in the family, in a couple, that we deserve to be loved. That make us double our energy and enthusiasm, our desire to do, to commit ourselves, that double our love and tenderness.
It is (also) in this way that love does not wear out but rather grows over time, because it is nourished by our ability to be together, rewarding the other with our ability to not take for granted or, worse, due, everything they do for us.
We must therefore go back to educating (and re-educating ourselves) to say thank you, to illuminate our (and other people’s) lives with this wonderful ability to make others feel precious to us. Today even more than yesterday, because it is in difficult days that we appreciate how the essential is invisible to the eyes, but very visible to the heart.
I wholeheartedly agree with your profound observations on the difficulties and immense value of expressing gratitude and affection, Aldo. Your insightful words beautifully articulate how embracing these positive expressions not only enriches the lives of those who receive them but also deeply benefits the giver by connecting them with their own positive emotions. Thank you!
I agree in not waiting to voice one’s appreciation – and make it specific. Like Ali Anani’s comment.
To some people, hearing the words is a balm. To others, love is in how we show up, in promises kept, in boundaries respected, in open ears and shoulders to cry on. No words needed. In my observation, “I love you” in words can seem empty to the recipient if action doesn’t seem congruent.
Words can be cheap – it is our job to give them the weight they deserve by having integrity between how we treat people and what we say to them.
Rather than saying “I love you” by default, we can ask people how best to convey to them that they matter to us. Perhaps they will say that they already know because of how our interactions flow. (Or perhaps we will learn something we have to sit with and digest for a while.)
I rarely use the words in Danish – they have much more weight in that language and are rarely used outside of romantic relationships. In English they are used as a goodbye greeting, so what do we actually mean? We need better words – can we anglify Agape?
Thank you for the mention, Charlotte and for sharing your great comment.
You are so right 🔆 Dennis Pitocco! I find that the more often I tell other people, “I love you” the easier it becomes to say it more and more. And to feel it. In some ways, I think there is a transformative aspect to saying the words and sending out the energy they contain. Why is this difficult? I have answers to that question that relate to role models and cultural conditioning and beliefs and habits and other reasons. None of them are good reasons. None of them are worth holding on to. Say “I love you” often and witness how you are transformed and how others are transformed. Great opportunity to add, I LOVE YOU!
Following your daily example, Victor, I’ve learned that there’s something truly transformative about expressing love frequently. When you say “I love you” more often, you create a pathway for connection that weakens barriers built from vulnerability and cultural conditioning. Each expression trains your heart to remain open, creating a beautiful cycle where saying the words deepens the feeling itself. This practice touches both you and others, fostering deeper relationships and a more compassionate way of moving through the world. I LOVE YOU for leading the way…
You post touched my heart and reminded me of the great people who helped me grow and pave my way in this life. My parents, my friends and my PhD supervisor. and not to forget my coworkers and school teachers.
I expressed my gratitude to most of them while they were living but one or two school teachers I did not. There is no way to go back and correct for my mistakes but yes, I lived the feeling of your noble post.
Dennis- a word to you. You are one of the people who helped me grow and in many ways. It is time to say it publicly I owe you much and thank you for all the support and encouragement that you gave to me. Big thank you.
Grateful for your very kind words and for your presence in my life my friend – it matters, and YOU matter…