What To Do When You Have To Start Over

Frankly, a growing number of people look for ways to deny their own role in the situation. Now, there are some awesome people who will listen, offer suggestions, and remain supportive in our journey. However, they cannot fix it nor is it up to them to do so. It is not their responsibility to step in and do the heavy lifting to shift things around in our favor. No, we own this responsibility and must execute the steps towards improving our circumstances. By Owning It, we are vested and are charged with putting in the sweat equity of identifying and executing a better way.

      • Accept Responsibility
      • Own the Process
      • Own the Steps
      • Embrace the Result

Re-Think It

This was touched on above. When we have to start over, it is critical to re-think our course of action. This is not code to re-hash what took place. However, we benefit by looking back to determine the best approach in re-thinking, re-doing, and re-looking at a different direction. Teams look at previous game films to re-evaluate their approach for the next contest. Candidates look at previous speeches to identify a better way to communicate the message moving forward. By re-thinking our path, we become a Transformer rather than a Conformer towards a better outcome. In re-thinking the approach, we identify critical adjustments which will serve as a catalyst towards starting over. Simply put, we realize things need to change to influence different results. If we continue to do the same thing yet hope for different result, the word Insanity should come to mind. By seeking different results, we must re-think and re-do our approach as we navigate thru the process of starting over.

Change Your Routine

All of us have habits. We do things in a certain way and sometimes at practically the same time each day. We have a routine when we wake up, how we approach our day, and settle in for the evening. These routines practically allow us to move thru the day in an automatic way. There is no real thought behind a lot of what is done. When we are starting over, a critical piece towards our success is the changing of our routines. This could be how we think about things, the order in which we do things, and execution of things completed from our to-do list. This is one of the scariest things we may have to do. Below are a few suggestions of ways we can change our routine. By changing the routine, we become more engaged towards re-booting and re-focusing our efforts.

      • Morning Routine
      • Order in which we do things at work
      • Different route to work
      • Trying new places outside of the norm
      • Changing the order of importance in own personal life

By changing our routines, we are changing the script. We are turning the page towards channeling a new approach, critical when having to start over. We become energized, excited, and enthusiastic as the new results begin to take shape. To be sure, this is not comfortable. As creatures of habit, we can be resistant towards doing something outside our normal routine. BUT…. We are having to start over and frankly, we do not like our current predicament. Resolve to enhancing your chances by changing your routine towards a better outcome.

Release It— Let It Go

Release the Past So That the Past Can Release You

We made a mistake… This happens frequently across the different facets of our life.  Some are so small that we do not give a second thought.  However, others seem to take a hold on us far too long.  A decision we would like to take back; a relationship that we let get away; a career move that turned out to be a mistake. Whatever the decision, we simply cannot let go.  One of the further consequences is when this becomes a silent battle.  Many people do not want to admit the struggle they subject themselves to as the regret becomes stronger as the event is replayed in the mind. It continues to simmer while tearing our emotional state apart by the constant replay. As much as you might like to change what happened, no amount of replays will change the performance completed in the past. To further illustrate, consider the window and mirror in your car. The front window is expansive providing a clear view of what is up ahead. Compare the size of the front window to the rear- view mirror. This mirror represents your past. It shows what is behind you yet the size is much smaller. So it is with the past.

      • The past is smaller than the future
      • The past requires you to look backwards
      • The past takes your attention away from your NOW
      • The past does not have to define the final outcome

What does holding on accomplish?  Is there a positive benefit?  In a word, No. In fact, it holds up the opportunity to move beyond the mistake and position us towards achieving better results.  It takes our mind out of the NOW as we remain stuck in the past.  Let It Go.  It happened, it is done, and the best outcome is where we look forward rather than remaining stuck behind.


Turn the key. Get started. Take action. Above all else, move towards a new outcome. The journey is not always going to be enjoyable. It will certainly not be comfortable There will be moments where the next step is unclear. It may be easy to throw our hands up in frustration as we trip over what we are trying to do. You have a job to do. A series of events have brought you to this place starting over. So, start where you are, use what you have, commit to a better ending for yourself, and most importantly, Get Started. We have heard in many sermons that “Trouble Don’t Last” and neither will where you find yourself at present. The challenge is to start over again and thru these steps, you will soon make the transition to the other side of the start. Stay encouraged and know you have what it takes to come out stronger than you were at the beginning of this journey.

      • Don’t Rush Things
      • If You Have To Start Over, Own It
      • Re-Think It
      • Change Your Routine
      • Release It—Let It Go
      • Start


Chris Adams
Chris Adams
CHRIS has over 30 years in the Hospitality Industry serving in a number of emerging and diverse roles. His specialty has been in the area of Staff Development, Organizational Enhancements, Task Force Management, and Public Relations. He has worked for several brands such as Sheraton, Hilton, Marriott, Holiday Inn, and several Independents. An advocate for strong community relationships, Adams has served on numerous boards and Non-Profits in an effort to bridge certain gaps towards better understanding and inclusion for all. Additionally, Adams serves as a Legal Task Force Consultant assisting Law Firms in developing case positions via mock juries, selection, and development of media strategies. These efforts have provided further strength towards mediation and successful case resolutions

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  1. Thanks Chris, good article. Is it possible for you to gives some links of support agencies that would help people in the predicaments you mention? I know churches were used to doing this sort of thing, but that doesn’t appear to be the case now – with an over-reliance on charities. I know a man who is helping the homeless in Florida – he has gotten together a group of people and is doing something about helping them. I’ll get his contact details if this helps at all. All the best, Kaye

  2. Well done, Chris. Excellent refresher course. I’ve seen many people haunted by the inability or unwillingness to let it go. What is past is past. Yesterday is gone. Having learned from it put it behind you and go forward.

    • Thank you for weighing in. Certainly, easier said than done. However, such a critical need to start where we are and move forward and,my backwards.