What Messages Are Playing Inside Your Head?

“My heart is stirring with a noble song…”

 ~ author unknown

This time of year, I am pleasantly awakened before dawn by the song of the Western Meadowlark. Her/his flutelike melody begins with a pure whistle descending into a series of warbles. It is as if the meadowlark outside my window is encouraging the rising sun to crest the mountaintop that keeps my home in its early morning shadows. As I lay there listening, the fragrance of the pinions and pines permeates my senses, meanwhile, the song of the Meadowlark is playing in the background much like the basso continue accompaniment of the harpsichord in a small chamber group.

At the end of the day, while I watch the last rays of the sun descend in the horizon, I am aware that the Meadowlark is still singing and I wonder, has s/he been singing all day long? While pondering this question, I asked myself, what song plays in my heart and mind all day long?

The Meadowlark continued to sing while I contemplated this question and it dawned upon me that we too sing a song all day yet often it is not a harmonious song that plays. Rather, it is a chatter that is most often negative and disharmonious, creating dissonance within us and in those around us. For over 20 years, I have worked with clients on what I call the negative mental chatter that plays in their heads all day long whether they are paying attention to it or not.

Did you know that your discordant song has a title?

“Your Inner Critical Judge.” The verses to the song have many variations upon the theme of, “I’m not good enough.” “I’m a fake.” “I’m not worthy” and so it goes. During my coaching sessions, it does not take long to uncover that there is a negative song playing and it is vital to focus upon the critical judge because it is the saboteur to your ultimate well being and feeling successful. In order to expel the inner critical judge, self-awareness needs to increase.

Taking control of the negative tape that plays in merely one aspect in gaining self-awareness.

• Are you aware of your inner critical judge that undermines and sabotages your feeling successful in the innermost part of yourself?

• Are you aware of what your negative song sings that is not worthy of you?

I have found that the negative song is a familiar voice that has probably been with you for a very long time. The saddest part of this song is that you have bought into it, believe it, and it undermines you fully achieving a sense of accomplishment and wellbeing.

The good news is, this is not who you are. The true essence of your being is more like the song of the Meadowlark, pure tone, harmonious, melodious, and delightful.

• How do you stop the negative tape that plays?

• Are you aware of when it plays the loudest?

• Do you want to stop the inner critical judges’ song?

Of course you do. All that is required is a disciplining of the mind and this is accomplished by adopting the following steps of my STOP Technique.

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The STOP Technique

1. Find out the main theme of your negative song. For example, if it is, “I’m not worthy”, then you replace it to “I am more than worthy.”

2. When you catch it playing then you say STOP and replace is with the positive statement, what I call the launch statement, as in the example above.

3. Following your launch statement, pontificate upon that theme and feel the positive energy of well being flow through you, lifting up your spirits.[/message][su_spacer]

Although these steps sound simple, it takes discipline and awareness to apply my STOP technique. It has to be practiced daily to interrupt the old song and replace it with the new. Each time you replace the song, you begin to feel powerful and the old song begins to fade away. When you want to give up it is probably when the song is playing the loudest.

When does your negative song play the loudest?

When you are tired and hungry, or when you have had a rough day accompanied by conflict. These are the times to STOP and label that you are hungry, tired, or had a rough day rather than let the song of the inner critical judge to take over.

Adopting the positive new song reshapes your outlook at the end of the day, and can bring back a renewed inner boldness through shattering the song titled, “The Inner Critical Judge.” As one client told me, it restored his self-confidence and he was more productive and courageous in making decisions.

Like the beautiful songs of the birds, or the unfolding of a flower that takes time to come into full bloom, these moments in nature mirror the phases of life and offer us a roadmap toward quieting the negative mental chatter that undermine the true essence of our being.

• A good coach can be that reflection you need to remind you that you are not the disharmonious song.

• A good coach gives you tools in mastering the saboteur while assisting in challenging you to be all that you are meant to accomplish while maintaining your inner power and strength.

Like my client that regained his self-confidence, what would change if you eradicated the mental chatter that holds you back?

Song of the Western Meadowlark

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