What I’ve Realized About Speaking Your Truth

The phrase ‘speaking your truth’ has always felt off to me for some reason. Now I’m clear about why that was, and what is available.

“When you speak your truth, you are the universe speaking through a human body. The universe within others, recognises this language.” Jey Matthews

I’ve had a bit of a problem with the phrase ‘speak your truth’ in the past because it sounded like there was a truth which is mine and which will always be mine and will always be the same because ‘this is who I am and this is what I believe to be the truth’. A bit like how values can be clung to like lifelines of how to behave — actually just creating a new limit for you to suffer within as a false, imagined boundary is set up against everything else.

But something fresh has become available to me with this in recent months. See what resonates for you.

What if truth here has a very definite ‘little t’

What if capital T truth is unchanging — literally unaffected by anything in this world of form. Absolutely still and peaceful and OK — un-harmable, un-touchable, un-diminishable. Silence.

“Remember one thing: except for silence, everything else is imagination.” Osho

And then what if this phrase ‘speak your truth’ has always been pointing to little t truth.

From that place, speaking your truth means expressing whatever looks real in the moment. Irrespective of what it is. Absent of ideas of how this makes me look, or how others will feel, or what it means for me. Pure expression.

Knowing that — although that’s the little t truth in that moment — it in fact has no longevity and no meaning beyond the expression of it: In. That. Moment.

Thought changes…experience changes…truth changes.

So then, in the expression of that truth, it creates space for new thoughts to appear — new temporary truths — and so they form the next little t truth in that next moment. And then the next. And the next.

It’s our belief that our words mean something important, fundamental, and lasting that we get confused about just saying them. And fearful of the impact.

In fact, the impact of our words on another…well, we’ll never know that, not really. But impact for us…when we know that every experience is either in alignment with what we are and feels good, or out of alignment with what we are and feels bad.

This feedback becomes our guidance system back into alignment and back into capital T truth. Which then has us be all the clearer when the next little t truth moment appears.

Let me give an example

Last year there was a situation with one of our kids and I disagreed with how my husband was handling it. I think my words were something like ‘but you’re being so controlling and judgemental and that’s never going to get the best’.

His reply — ‘And what are you being with me right now?’

Me — stumped.

And then…some space, and time with my coach and the recognition that yes — in the presence of ideas of ‘I need to control what husband is doing’ because of the judgement ‘he’s doing it wrong’ — out came controlling and judgemental words from my mouth.

My little t truth in that moment — totally out of alignment with what I really am (hence why it felt bad) — and totally amazing for enabling the conversation that led to the liberating insight that ‘oh yes! It was me too!’ And to see that ‘husband’ only appears as ‘bad judgemental person who must be controlled’ when I have ‘judgemental, controlling’ thought-glasses on.

And then, what’s interesting is what becomes available after that.

Because the mind thinks that ‘without my rules and judgements it will all go wrong and there’ll be chaos everywhere!’.

But in fact, when you see for yourself that it’s the holding of these temporary ideas as if they’re capital T Truths that causes suffering — the intelligence that you are just stops holding them as capital T Truths. It makes no sense anymore.

And so then — when you speak — it’s through a clear channel. Absent of false boundaries and barriers. Absent of false defences constructed of little t truths — desperately trying to hold the force of life back with their flimsy-ness.

So that now when you speak your truth it’s life speaking to life. Love speaking to love. The universe speaking to the universe. Still temporary, still only little t truth for this moment now. But now it gets heard. Because it’s strong and quiet. It’s effortless. It’s obvious. And action gets taken. In alignment. With Truth.


By noticing all the places where you keep quiet because you think it will cause problems if you speak up.

Or indeed where you speak up, and that doing so really does seem to cause problems.

Then see if you can identify what’s being believed in that moment — and see it’s not a capital T Truth.

With love, Helen

Helen Amery
Helen Ameryhttp://wildfigsolutions.co.uk/
Reconnecting you to innate brilliance for a more fulfilling life. Disillusionment happens when, things that we took to be true, start to look less so. People, belief systems, ways of working, societal norms. As these cracks, in reality, start to show we often look around to see what else is available to make sense of this, and these moments provide the opportunity for great change and the ability to step into a whole new and fresh experience of life. I work with disillusioned people who’ve worked hard all their lives to climb the career ladder, increase their income, who got the family and the house and the car and…then they look around and realise something’s still missing. They don’t feel more fulfilled. They don’t feel successful. They don’t feel secure. Sometimes these things have even become worse. My career has developed through commercial HR into psychology-based coaching, and now my work goes beyond psychology to the fundamental truths behind our human experience. This is the final shift in perspective that frees us from the imagined limitations we’ve gathered through life and reconnects us to our innate brilliance. It’s the direct path that other development can meander us to. From here we find fulfilment, security and a feeling of success – and we find we’re able to enjoy everything we already had, and new things, in an entirely fresh way. My business is called Wild Fig Solutions because the Wild Fig has the deepest roots in the world and I always cared about getting to the heart of what was going on. Now this work is really that as it reconnects us to our heart at the deepest level and naturally rebalances us so that we use the brilliance of our head in the way it works best. I work with clients online, in one-to-one and group coaching programmes, to help them reconnect to their innate brilliance. See my book here: Let’s Get Honest About: Work