What do you say after you have been away for so long? Where do you start to begin? Or do you start saying what you had to say in the middle and work your way back? I do not have answers to these questions as of now but I am hoping you do. If you do know the answers to my questions then I am essentially asking you to please drop me a line or two with your response.
I will say that it feels good to be back with you. Some time back I had written an article entitled Hello, Well It Looks Like I Am Back…..For Now, with an obviously incorrect feeling that I would never (never say never) need to write another article like that once more. Then it happened again… I went away (for various reasons) yet again. This time turned out to be for an even longer time than I could have planned even if I wanted to. However, when I wanted to end my “drought” there were no words to spring from my writing well.
As you can tell this was not a planned absence. Although it is not uncommon for people to disappear from view with only a handful people knowing what is happening. That is how it was with me. Yes, health played a starring role in this play but that still was not the main reason I went away. With life, there are complications that throw off your track before your train arrives at the station. My trains stopped leaving the station even though there was no red signal that I had to come to a halt for.
Misery accompanied me wherever I went during the course of my silent time. When something that is at the core of your very being is taken away how do you expect to feel? In this situation, there was only one medium to express my feelings in but time was always in short supply on that day. At every point in time until tonight when this article “popped” into my head I thought what I once had was gone forever. Only death is forever.
During my time in exile, the world was ablaze with TRUMP, TRUMP, and TRUMP! I sat in front of my computer watching the inauguration with welts of tears in my eyes from the pride I felt to be an American with only good things to come. I still believe that to this very day. Alas, the exuberant feeling was short lived as I slipped back into despair borne out of the disappearance of what was so dear to me.
Minutes fell into hours that all too soon became seemingly unending days without words. The feeling of hopelessness enveloped me as my keyboard that my fingers used to dance over to create the magic of words that came to life in front of my eyes now lay still and silent. I could not help hearing the lyrics from a song Paul Simon penned entitled “Bookends.” “Preserve your memories they are all that’s left you.”
The rust from not writing for such an extended period of time spread like mold on bread. Adding to my emotional state was the equally sudden distancing I felt from my prior work. I would read a piece that I had written shaking my head in disbelief that I had authored that article. There was this yearning to be able to do what I used to do with such ease. Or perhaps I should resign myself that this is part of the plan that G-d has for me and I had to follow wherever this path led.
I would lay awake in bed each night wondering if this is what G-d is doing perhaps to punish me for an earlier sin. Why would he take writing away from me as my punishment? When you want to teach your child right from wrong you punish them by connecting their wrong with a direct consequence of their action. They soon learn to link consequences to their actions. So the question that only G-d can answer if he should so choose is what did I do? Where did I go wrong and how did I let it go wrong?
In my battle for words that I am in the midst of I realize that the question I posed in the title of this article remains unanswered. We are taught at an early age that every question has an answer to it but sometimes the answer is never found. In my case, it may very well be that the reason I have no answer for my own question is that I simply am not asking for what I am looking for in the right words. So again I ask what do you say when you have been away? Or perhaps more correctly I should ask what words do you say when you have been away for a while only now returning.
Maybe I can try to come up with the answer that I am begging to find on my own by trying to transport myself back to the times when words just flowed like water from a fountain. You have heard the old saying that you have to learn to crawl before you can learn to walk. Picture this a soon to be 61-year-old man crawling (not physically) much like a spider trying to find that ideal spot to attach his web to. My ideal spot to create is where I am sitting. The ideal condition that I find works best for when I am trying to write is a dark room with only the light from the monitor for purposes of illumination.
As I begin the process of concluding my first article in what seems like centuries ago I would like to first thank my readers who reached out to me so enthusiastically whenever an old article was published. It was always for you that I wrote. This is my way of inviting new people like you into my life via writing. You have inspired me in so many ways. I hope in some way (positive I would hope) I have made a difference in your day.
After thinking things over carefully my answer to the posed question of what to say after you have been away is simply say hello again my friends. May your journey through life lead you to many magical and mystical places with a smile on your face, prayers in your heart and of course let you always have a song that is only yours to sing.
Hi Joel !
Enjoyed your article. Your Final Answer is … Perfect !
My first thought was the theme song lyrics to “Welcome Back Kotter”. Then I continued reading.
After awhile the next thought that sprung to mind was – he lost his Muse ! She/He will return… relax!
As I finished the piece, what should spring to my grey cells and my ears but the lyrics from The Beatles “Hello, Goidbye”.
Oops! I Googled & copied, but the pic will not Paste ! Duh ?
I am a newbie here, but anyway –
Welcome Back !
Pax Tecum – Tom Hyland
P.S. Was a contributing member of Authors Den for 14 years, had over 1,300,000 “Hits” but never made a “plugged nickel” !
In reality, writing one’s own life does not only have the value of a witness or a therapeutic quality, but responds to one of the basic needs of the individual, the need to talk about oneself. Telling yourself is not exactly telling someone else, but telling yourself. What can be told can be thought of, and what can be thought of can be understood. In other words, the moment I leave the world of everyday worries and systematically reorganize the facts of my life, it will be automatic to arrive at a form of understanding. Then it is clear why we write. We write to search for the truth, where the emphasis is not really on “truth”, but on “research”. The truth is basically a very strange little animal: it is always with us when we look for it everywhere, but it gets out of hand in the precise instant in which we believe we have grasped it.
Writing, then, is often a solitary activity in which it is difficult to find feedback, and it is really important to be in a safe environment where you can share ideas, ideas, drafts and our writings in general.
Thank you for this Joel! As a newbie, I appreciate your honesty, openness and eloquent prose. I often think ahead about my next article. Hopefully, if a dry spell does occur, my mind will churn and an idea will sprout.?
Someone once asked me why I wrote. It consumes an amazing amount of time and I assure you it is not going to make me rich. I write so that my children can touch and feel my words telling of the ones that came before us and the stories they told me. These are the chronicles of our family and even though they come from my childhood memories and are deeply rooted in a child’s remembrance at least they may feel what it was like in the time before them and cherish the things the elders left behind.
We can ‘t change the world, we often struggle to make changes in our own life. Yet we all have a story to tell and maybe we can reach one person or make one new friend. In the end to reach one person is a powerful thing. To make one new friend betters both people. Strong Ink My dear friend I am blessed to call you my friend.
I’m perfectly agree with you. This is the meaning of writing. The sharing!
I am in the dry spell now, wondering if it matters to even write, do people really read or care what you have to say. On the other hand, this venue which allows for me to write when I feel the words needing to be put to paper, I feel thankful to BizCatalyst. Thank you Joel for this. God Bless
Holy smoke – I could have written that. I’ve been around BizCatalyst for a long time – longer than you, I believe – and one of the reasons for my “dry spell” was the new talent (like you) whose words were so much more profound than I could ever come up with. I started writing because I though – naively – that my words might influence others to come together rather than divide. I think I just lost my confidence. Like you, I’m trying to get back to a place where “words flowed like water from a fountain.” What I’ve gleaned from the dry spell was that it doesn’t matter whether I can “change the world,” but it does matter that I have something that, to me, is important and it is fulfilling to say it. Sounds good, but I’m still working on the execution. Thanks for sharing your story. I’m thankful for this venue to share my thoughts.
Carol, Thank you so much for reading and commenting on my article. Writing is the one constant in my life. My words are not special as I just write whatever comes to mind. The goal behind my articles is to touch people and perhaps make them think or feel something. BizCatalyst is the preeminent place for writers of which you are a very vital part of. As for “my story” more and more of it has been on display these last few articles where I have focused strictly on “personal” articles and events that have shaped my life. I am again so very happy that you read my article. Your words were incredibly touching to me. I wish nothing but joy from your writing and that you can touch people with your words!
“The goal behind my articles is to touch people and perhaps make them think or feel something.” I like this. I think I will “liberally borrow.” 🙂
Carol, In order for this to work you must truly desire to touch people with your words and breathe that soul into your articles! By the way are we connected on LinkedIn?
Carol I don’t know you but it is the people like you that inspired me to be a part of BizCatalyst 360. It is people like you that encouraged me to share my story and engaged me in support. So if one person can make a difference you my friend have. You cut a path through the unknown and made the journey easier for us that followed you. Thank for being you and caring about us.