We Are All Just Fumbling Our Way Through Life As Best We Can

I am constantly banging on about how it’s so important to be yourself, to be honest about who you are, what is really important to you, to define your reality, and to ignore the pull of comparison.

Yet only yesterday when I was asked what my biggest challenges were in life, my demons still showed up loud and clear – self-esteem and self-worth. And at the heart of these lifelong challenges, the same questions that have plagued me for years, are still there:

1. Did I choose the right path or was I too scared of it?

2. Did I really choose to leave the shiny career, or could I just not live up to the expectations of it?

3. Could I have really been one of those female success stories, or would I have spent my life chasing the illusion instead?

4. Would my children have been better served with a different role model?

5. Would I have added more value to this world, had I not felt I had sacrificed so much, or failed in some way?

And every time I see the pictures and read the success stories of all of those amazing women in senior careers who appear to have it all, the ultimate question comes back time and time again – why was I not able to stay in that tribe?

And I am sure that there are many women out there, who like me, are often faced with that deeply uncomfortable question, because when we chose as a society to only celebrate women through one particular lens, it leaves so many of us out in the wilderness, wondering where we belong and how we become of value.

But the point of this post is not to answer any of these questions – I’m not sure anyone can, they are deeply complicated and personal, but I do think that it is important for others to know, that in our own unique way, we are all simply fumbling our way through this mad thing called life as best as we can.

I’m sure we all have insecurities, doubts, and questions, all of the time. We are constantly presented with choices and different paths and all we can ever do is what we genuinely think is the best thing at that point in time.

The words of Maya Angelou often hold my hand at times like these:

Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.

~Maya Angelou.

So, when I know better I’ll do better and until then I’ll carry on doing the best I can and I hope you can too.


Nik Davis
Nik Davis
NIK DAVIS is a business transformation expert and has spent 20 years in the corporate world. Her comfort zone is order, logic and applying analytical tools to solve complex problems. She is also a keen observer of life, a writer and eccentric. Nik has recently returned to the world of work after taking a career break to spend time with her family. Upon her return, she found that her perspective had changed, as had the world she was returning to. Nik decided to carve out a new place in that world and mould some of it to fit her too. Nik sees life from quirky angles, shaped by experiences and the vast amount of knowledge we now have access to. She likes to write about her experiences and observations. To ‘tell it how it is’ and to find a more authentic way to live, whether in our professional or personal lives. Nik often talks about finding ‘The Third Way’. It’s a philosophy about life, having a personal life as well as a career, making money and being socially generous, being logical and sensitive, living by the rules of a society but not being afraid to challenge them, inspiring others to feel good but not for your own ego, giving rather than taking. Nik wants to make a difference to this world by getting people to see things differently, to try new ways of working but most of all, to re-discover our true selves and therefore reach our true potential. Nik also has two other persona’s: nikdavis which is where Nik writes about her deeply personal experiences of life. Nik runs a facebook group alongside this website to create a safe place for people to discuss the topics that are raised in her blog. Nik’s second persona is Lilly Isabella and this is where she shares her passion of fashion and design.

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