Dear ones we want to give you a rule of thumb that can be used for every situation. When you apply this simple philosophy you’ll place yourself on the road to joy and freedom, the place where no rules are necessary because your natural state is love and from this place of unconditional love you’ll be unwilling to participate in any acts of harm. Judgment, whether it be about yourself or others is an act of harm and opinions that are veiled judgments are no better.
Unless you can share something that is loving and supportive to yourself or others, your opinion is not needed
It’s time for each one of you to step into spiritual adulthood. Instead of making excuses for your comments that are judgments masquerading as innocent opinions we want you to cease this behavior altogether. Unless you can share something that is loving and supportive to yourself or others, your opinion is not needed. However, we don’t want you keeping these thoughts to yourself tucked away in a box marked private where they’ll fester and morph into thoughts of even greater destruction. We want you to eliminate these thoughts altogether. When they come to mind, don’t greet them with open arms as though they’re long lost friends. No, be firm, close the door on their presence. Make it clear that they’re not wanted and immediately fill your mind with thoughts of love and joy.
Change that is truly transformative is always gentle and may even appear slow or unproductive at times
Practice telling your thoughts the truth, “Judgment, you’re not wanted here. You bring hurt, shame and destruction with you for myself and others. I’m choosing to shut the door on all negative thoughts. Once you’ve called attention to your mind’s betrayal you’ll be able to stop it from continuing in this unproductive direction and gently steer it in a direction you do desire. We remind you that change which is productive is never forceful or painful. Change that is truly transformative is always gentle and may even appear slow or unproductive at times. Things that happen quickly had years of prior conditioning that made them possible and it’s this conditioning that must be undone before the new behavior of non-judgment can be effective.
As long as you allow the judgmental ego to remain in charge, your authentic self, the naturally loving and giving side of yourself that is unconditionally loving will be forced to hide in the shadows and keep itself small
Let us also examine the corrosive effect of the opinion. Those who have an opinion about everything are using it to hide personal insecurities. When you have to be right, know more or be in charge of every situation, you’re living in fear. Fear that you don’t measure up in some way, shape or form. Fear that you’re not as talented, intelligent or powerful as another person. If you’re not comfortable allowing others to be right, to go first, to come first or to place first, you’re in an ego battle that ‘s slowly strangling your life essence from your being. As long as you allow the judgmental ego to remain in charge, your authentic self, the naturally loving and giving side of yourself that is unconditionally loving will be forced to hide in the shadows and keep itself small. However, what ends up happening, is that you’ll experience deep unhappiness for that which you truly desire will remain forever hidden as you pursue the worthless goals of the ego that lack sustenance.
If you’ve been given the desire to serve in any capacity then the ability to do so is also yours
If you find that you’re deeply unhappy or feeling unfulfilled it’s time to stop, take a breath and ask yourself, “What is it that I really desire?” Then wait quietly in the space of the heart and be open to the gentle promptings, the deep yearning, that makes itself known to you. Understand that if you’ve been given the desire to serve in any capacity then the ability to do so is also yours. You may be tempted to be harshly critical about your chance for success but again this is just the ego gasping for breath. When you find that which lights your heart on fire and makes you feel alive it will not be fully formed, you’ll not have perfect execution or flawless form but you will have a basic gift that can be nurtured and practiced until it’s truly yours. Each one of you has a gift. There are no exceptions to this rule, no was denied the ability to shine. Standing in judgment, choosing to be hyper-critical or preventing yourself and others from trying because the fear of failure looms large will never prevent you from failing. It may keep you from trying but it cannot keep you safe from failure.
The one who judges is the most frightened, least secure person in the room
We advise that you suspend judgment and refuse to entertain all thoughts of negativity because you now recognize they’re only a form of fear. If anything, the one who judges is the most frightened, least secure person in the room. The one who’s harshly critical will never be the most accomplished but they will always be the most pitiful and the one who secretly believes they have the least to offer. We invite you to suspend criticism and invest your energy in all that’s uplifting.
Recognize you’re own perfection as you celebrate everything that’s right about others
It’s never joy that will cause you to fall because you’ve chosen to fly too high. It’s always safe to fly higher when you’re flying on the wings of unconditional love.
But it’s always a dive into disaster when you try to correct your behavior from the low place of judgment and criticism. It’s time for you to fly free. Recognize you’re own perfection as you celebrate everything that’s right about others. When you’re focused on the magnificence that already exists, you’ll have no room in your energetic field for condemnation.
Great article, Marcia! As none of us are perfect we have no right to pass judgment on others especially in public where the potential for hurt is greatest. Stating an opinion is not passing judgment but that too should be done in the least harmful way. At work, our supervisors or even our co-workers may pass judgment on us. In the environment, your work may be judged or your work habits. It is important that the review be devoid of personal criticism. Before you pass judgment on somebody else who can easily turn around and judge you in a vicious unnecessary exercise in human cruelty you may wish to examine and be aware of your own shortfalls. Each of us is unique. We are all treasures in our own way. We all need to keep that in mind.
I love your compassion, Joel! We do need to remember that each one of us is a magnificent and unique being who brings something wonderful to the table. So often in my work, I find that those who come to me have been criticized right out of their ability to express themselves in any meaningful way. May we always remember to treat others as though they’re a precious jewel realizing that how we treat others will be the measuring stick for how we’re treated in return. Again, thanks for sharing your wisdom, Joel. Sending you love and blessings
Marcia, I know what it feels like to judged m Even worse is the feeling when you know you have been judged unfairly or by th9se who are not in a position to judge. I also know what a horrible feeling it is to be the one who is acting as the judge and jury as I have acted as. None of us are better than anybody else least of all me.. Our only real judge is G-d All of our deeds and misdeeds will be looked at when we die. That will determine what will become of our souls. Thank you, Marcia!
May abundant blessings always be yours, Joel. We’ve all been both judged and guilty of judging others but somewhere in our growth may we all learn to appreciate everything in ourselves and others. Sending you love and blessings.
Thank you, Marcia