SIX BLIND MEN were discussing exactly what they believed an elephant to be, since each had heard how strange the creature was, yet none had ever seen one before. So the blind men went to the market to find an elephant and discover what the animal was really like.
The first blind man approached the beast and felt the animal’s firm flat side. “It seems to me that the elephant is just like a wall,” he said to his friends.
The second blind man reached out and touched one of the elephant’s tusks. “No, this is round and smooth and sharp – the elephant is like a spear.”
Intrigued, the third blind man stepped up to the elephant and touched its trunk. “Well, I can’t agree with either of you; I feel a squirming writhing thing – surely the elephant is just like a snake.”
The fourth blind man
was of course by now quite puzzled. So he reached out, and felt the elephant’s leg. “You are all talking complete nonsense,” he said, “because clearly the elephant is just like a tree.”
Utterly confused, the fifth blind man stepped forward and grabbed one of the elephant’s ears. “You must all be mad – an elephant is exactly like a fan.”
Finally, the sixth man approached, and, holding the beast’s tail, disagreed again. “It’s nothing like any of your descriptions – the elephant is just like a rope.”
And all six blind men continued to argue, based on their own particular experiences, as to what they thought an elephant was like. It was an argument that they were never able to resolve. Each of them was concerned only with their own perception. None of them had the full picture and none could see any of the other’s points of view. While in part, each blind man was right, none was wholly correct.
It Happen In Real Life As Well!
Most of us fall into the trap, at least some of the time, of thinking our way is the right way and their way is wrong. Yet, to be an effective leader, it’s important to be able to see things from other people’s perspective—especially when you are trying to resolve conflict or sort out a really difficult issue. Here’s an exercise that can help you do this.
Think of a situation involving yourself and someone else where the outcome was not as you would have liked or where you were in disagreement.
- First position (you) – First consider things only from your point of view. What did you expect? What were your needs? Why was it important to you?
- Second position (the other person) – Now consider the other perspective. And it really helps to physically move to another chair or position. What were they expecting? What was their main priority? What did they value most and believe in?
- Third position (the bystander) –Again it helps to move around, and this time, stand away from the scene so that you can see yourself in the first position and the other person in the second position too. Be completely objective and unattached to the outcome. What do you see about the other two points of view? Are their similarities? Can the differences be bridged? What could either, or both, parties have done differently to reach a more productive conclusion?
Smart Moves Tip
The next time you find yourself in a conflict or disagreement with your boss, team or other key people in your professional or personal life, remember that you may be seeing the ‘tail’ of a situation, whilst the other people see the ‘tusk’ or the ‘trunk’. Step back and try the exercise above so you can see the whole ‘animal’ instead and understand those other points of view!
Would you like to find out more about the blind spots that are potentially limiting your leadership? Could it be your emotional intelligence – how you see and deal with the world around you? Let’s talk! Contact Marcia, a Board Certified Executive Coach, who works with savvy entrepreneurs, CEO’s, executives, and management teams to build their companies AND make a difference in their world. Remember it’s not how smart you are, it how you use your SMARTS.
My Motto Is:
If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got. Therefore, MOVE outside of your comfort zone; thats where the MAGIC happens.” To bring that magic to your leadership and business, subscribe to Marcias monthly Execubrief: Business Edge Smart Growth Strategies with a insights, inspiration and intelligence on how to build great businesses that matter those that do well and do good.
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