Suffering is Grace

In Indigenous and Eastern cultures, growing older equates to wisdom, respect, and reverence. In Western culture, we worship youth, beauty, and physical prowess, so much so that to adhere to this ideology you end up actually fighting against nature itself!

The demise of beauty and strength are all part of the natural cycle of life, but by trying to deny it we are creating psychologies that fuel our ego and foster separateness, individualism, and paranoia.

All of which ultimately leads to more suffering.

Our culture promotes and cherishes happiness yet is rarely open to holding space for suffering. Most of us have become so good at hiding our own pain and fear and appearing to always be happy.

We can typically find space to admit a little suffering in, from time to time, but if we get too close to it, we tend to recoil. And yet it is not the fear and pain which frightens us.

It is the opening up of our own heart.

The act of you becoming conscious, through the power of connection, of another’s truth ultimately unlocks the door to your own secrets.

Enter Ego, in some ways the saviour, since the heart would gladly give it all away for free. In more ways, the barrier to allowing the coherence between heart and head and this conflict is no doubt for most of us the real cause of our suffering…

However, when we can become the mirror, we reflect someone else’s suffering and in so doing supplant the intellectual mind from the driving seat for an instant, allowing the floodgates of our hearts to open. Acknowledging both the joy and confronting us with our own repressed unhappiness.

Hence the need for all the masks and the pretence, the constant need to busy ourselves (intellectual mind dominance…), and even worse to deny its very existence.

In my experience, most of us are not willing to truly look within and gaze upon our TRUSELF.

Suffering helps to burn through those impurities and expedite your chances of awakening to the truth in this lifetime. It is your soul’s purpose in each lifetime to release that karmic weight and open you up to access more love, more energy, more light.

To allow a greater sense of being and a deeper connection to that unity consciousness and practice of unconditionality.

This is why they say; “Suffering is Grace and the window to our awakening…”

Still not convinced, I know its heavy…

Remember the first two of Buddha’s 4 teachings:

1: All life is suffering

2: All suffering is based on the attachment of the mind

It goes on to say that it is only when we can let go of that which we cling to, both our attractions and aversions, can we begin to see through the illusion and move beyond that conditioned negative perception so associated with suffering and accept it for the grace it truly is…

Nobody says this path is easy, nor should it be taken lightly and yet for those who have acknowledged and accepted their suffering as the purifying, self-edifying tool it was always designed to be, the awakening and awareness which is offered and which has always been present sets them on a path which few ever turn back from.

So I invite you, friends, to connect with your #consciousheart, radiate loving awareness, embody compassion, awaken your #TRUSELF and #BElove.


Rhys Thomas
Rhys Thomas
I work with individuals who have suffered a traumatic experience in their lifetime, who no longer wish to have it impact their mental health, their relationships with others and dictate how they show up in this world. When you show up as your #truself you’re empowered by that inner voice, you let go of attachment and judgement, are free to move beyond fear and expectation, to truly manifest your dreams into reality. There remains a taboo around the word trauma and many people when asked might assume the defensive and say, “not me”, for fear of how this may be perceived by others, but every single one of us has faced adversity at some time which has either built us up or broken us down. Personality traits, behaviour patterns, belief structures all stem from our past experiences but coping mechanisms forged in the fire only ever weigh us down, lead to more pain and deny our #truself from returning. The truth is it’s not the incident itself which is the real trauma it is the response to it and the resulting impact you allow it to have on your life and those around you, from that point forward, which does the real harm. Choosing curiosity over fear, self-compassion over self-judgement and acceptance over denial are the first steps we use to break down the protective walls which were once built up for protection, but which ultimately keep us stuck living out familiar storylines and conforming to a pale imitation of our #truself. Having studied many different modalities and practices during my own journey including kundalini yoga, breathwork, meditation, indigenous ancient wisdoms, emotional intelligence, mindfulness and loving awareness, Buddhist psychology, Vedic scripture and astrology, Zen practices and Taoist philosophy, I am uniquely blessed to help guide you along this path of your awakening and reconnecting you with your #truself. Founder of #truself Coaching; 1:1 and Mastermind Groups; Workshop/Retreats Designer, Facilitator, Trainer, Guide; Bespoke Corporate Wellbeing Programmes; Online Community Builder; Writer and Content creator – Holistic Wellbeing, Mental Health, Mindfulness; #TNT 2.0 Podcast Host – Exploding the Status Quo on Leadership (100+ episodes) Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Anchor. Previous: 18+ years in Corporate Sales and Executive Search in UK and APAC regions.

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  1. Fhys, great piece of which I could write about in length. Suffering is a grace given to us by God who created us. We can only receive grace from God. I beleive that suffering brings awarness of our weaknesses and allows us to turn to the things of this world that are good, kind and full of compassion. Thank you.