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Speak From Your Heart

Where the lips are silent, the heart knows a thousand words to speak.

~Rumi

What happens in your life when you speak from your heart? If you gave your heart permission to speak up, what would it say?

Among many unfortunate words that entered my ears as a child, then morphed into unwanted guests in my mind, and eventually shape-shifted into nasty squatters that made the truths of what I observed and lived run and hide were these: “I will listen to you when you actually have something worthwhile to say.” Because this was spoken by an important person in my life, I allowed this sentence to become a self-imposed gag around my mouth. Internally, I began a silent search for what might be considered “worthwhile.”

Learning to silence yourself, to barely be seen and definitely not heard, can become a coping strategy among bombastic, loud, bitter, critical, domineering, clanging bell people. You might still silence your voice in meetings, in quiet moments with beloved ones, or when you erroneously believe you have nothing worthwhile to say. You might even be silent when people really know you have something valuable to share. Fearful of uttering worthless puffs of syllables into the air, you hand your tongue to your fluffy cat for safekeeping.

Almost all other situations persisted as places where I conveniently lost my voice often followed by being harshly judged or criticizing myself for not speaking up or putting my foot in my mouth.

As a child, I stopped counting the number of times people asked me, “Does the cat have your tongue?” At a high school slumber party, as we crawled into our sleeping bags, I vividly remember a classmate ask me, “Do you ever talk or are you just quiet by nature?” I mumbled some incomprehensible syllables. Once again, shame burned deep inside me for I felt caught between a rock and a hard place. Regularly damned for speaking and then feeling ashamed for not speaking became quite a communication landmine. Often feeling sacred safety in a classroom setting, I learned quickly the rewards of being an excellent student. Almost all other situations persisted as places where I conveniently lost my voice often followed by being harshly judged or criticizing myself for not speaking up or putting my foot in my mouth.

Do you notice where you feel safe or worthy to speak up, to share an idea, to offer a suggestion, to ask a question, to feel the resonance of your own vocal cords in your throat? Do you talk out loud to yourself while in nature or in the privacy of your own home? After you speak with others, do you question everything you just said, running your words through a mental flour-sifter of doubts? A quiet search for worthwhile words may lead you to a wonderful destination.

A soft, tender, raw, and real experience of resonance takes place. You discern the source of your own valuable voice.

All of that silence as a child, young adult, or adult can gently guide you eventually to the heart.  You might notice it feels easier to listen to people who speak from their passion and lived experiences. The uplifting podcasts, Ted Talks, and beautiful songs sung can inspire you to listen with a reverent presence. Anytime clients, colleagues, or beloved ones speak truths from their hearts, you might get goosebumps or another good feeling. Your body can become a tuning fork for words warmed by love and honesty, spiraled through the vocal cords, and uttered with lips, tongue, and breathe out the mouth. A soft, tender, raw, and real experience of resonance takes place. You discern the source of your own valuable voice.

Many eagerly await your heart infused words for they will be moved by your truths, ideas, and passion. Break your sound barriers. Others will be inspired to listen when you speak from your heart for that is where an unwavering love heals your fears and shame, courage dances with vulnerability, compassion holds grief in its strong arms, and the magic of long-held dreams begins to come alive. A vision for your life can emerge transforming your experience of being human, heard, and vibrantly here. Welcome home.

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Laura Staley
Laura Staleyhttp://www.cherishyourworld.com
The founder of Cherish Your World, Laura Staley passionately helps people thrive by guiding them to a holistic transformation of space, heart, mind, body, and soul. Laura knows that there’s a relationship between the conditions of our homes or workplaces and the quality of our lives. Trained and certified with the Western School of Feng Shui and seasoned by almost two decades of working with a variety of clients, Laura uses her intuition and expertise to empower her clients to produce remarkable results in their lives. Her trifecta of serving people includes speaking, writing, and compassionate listening. As a columnist, Laura writes personal essays focused on self-discovery, feng shui, emotional health, and transformations from the inside out. Laura is the published author of three books: Live Inspired, Let Go Courageously and Live with Love: Transform Your Life with Feng Shui, and the Cherish Your World Gift Book of 100 Tips to Enhance Your Home and Life. Prior to creating her company, Laura worked as a fulltime parent and an assistant professor at Ohio Wesleyan University. She earned a Ph.D. in political science from The Ohio State University. Her joys in life include laughing with loved ones, dancing, reading, meditating, running, being in nature, and listening to music she loves. She resides in Black Mountain, NC with lovable dog, Layla. Laura is a contributing author to the inspiring book Crappy to Happy: Sacred Stories of Transformational Joy

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7 CONVERSATIONS

  1. Great message! I thank BIZCAT Dennis Pitocco for posting it to the Women of Facebook page for Blog Weekend. I believe our parents and the adults in our lives mimic their parents and often speak to children from habits rather than from their heart. Your article is an important message to any parent. Think before you speak and ask yourself, “Is that coming from a loving heart or an old habit?”

    • Thank you so much for this insight and contribution to the discussion, Kat. Yes, may parents gently and powerfully engage their internal work of healing so they are free to speak from a loving heart rather than worn out ways that can wreak havoc. Clinton Kay on LinkedIn offered this: THINK-T-Is it True? H-Is it Helpful I-Is it Inspiring? N-Is it Necessary? K-Is it Kind? Parenting can be the most challenging and rewarding labor of love in our world. Gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice all come with the package swirling around words, too. I’m grateful you found the article helpful and useful. I appreciate your taking the time to read and so thoughtfully comment.

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