How do you get up from rock bottom? What do you do when you fall on your butt? What do you do when it feels like everything is falling apart? What do you do when life keeps sending you obstacles that throw you off course?
Life always seems to send obstacles and challenges to throw us off course. These obstacles can create frustration, stress, and anxiety within us. The journey can be annoying and difficult when you allow stressful emotions to take over. But actually each unique challenge is meant to make us stronger as we learn and grow. I have had plenty of rock bottom moments. So many moments that threw me completely off course because stress got in the way. And in the heat of the moment, getting caught in the overwhelm and frustration creates havoc in our lives. I have made plenty of these mistakes by getting caught in overwhelm and losing sight of my goals, dreams, and purpose.
The amazing thing I have learned is that even after really challenging moments, everything works out in our favor in the long run. In the midst of chaos, it appears that our world is caving in around us but after all the dust settles, we evolve and life is better.
Think about a stressful moment in your past. Something that felt overwhelming and frustrating in the moment. Maybe it was a physical injury, a lost job, a break-up, a big argument, or an illness. In the heat of the moment, you likely got caught up in the stressful feelings making you feel helpless and hopeless. The effects of this stressful moment can last hours, days, weeks, or months. Trust me I know that some of these obstacles can truly get in our way and make us feel like the world is against us. I have felt that way plenty of times. Now think about that same situation after a few months passed. Things settled and life started to return to normal. Your drive and motivation returned. And life returned to its typical pace. And when you reflect on those events, you might notice that everything worked out. But it wasn’t exactly as you planned it.
I lost sight of who I am and I lost hope for everything. And that extreme stress caused sudden emotional shifts and crying fits.
For example, back in November 2019, I had an upset customer throw my life completely off balance. In the heat of the moment, I was caught in my stressful emotions and felt a deep dread and impending doom. I was caught in negative emotions and let the stress take over my life for weeks. During this stressful situation, I felt helpless, hopeless, and alone. And literally in that moment when it all transpired, I was alone. It all happened when my husband was away with my oldest son. I was home alone with my youngest. And I could have been enjoying this fun bonding time with him. But instead, I was dealing with the subconscious self-limiting beliefs that made me spiral into a sense of fear and overwhelm. I was so stressed and anxious that I completely felt like my world was caving in on me. And I forgot I had 15 years of amazing customer service on my side. I forgot that everyone has a bad day sometimes. I forgot that sometimes you can’t please everyone even when you do everything in your power to support them. I forgot that I am amazing at my job and that my colleagues all knew it. I lost sight of who I am and I lost hope for everything. And that extreme stress caused sudden emotional shifts and crying fits. And this wasn’t the first or the last intensely stressful situation.
In the heat of the moment, I let stress, anxiety, and fear get the best of me. The situation left me feeling drained, exhausted, and frustrated on all levels. I was physically drained of energy. I lost mental focus and productivity. I was emotionally frustrated and overwhelmed.
The funny thing is that I know better. I know the power of using your awareness to free your body and mind of negative emotions. And I teach my clients to use their awareness to take action and get out of these situations. But everyone makes mistakes, even me. Because the subconscious mind is more powerful than we can imagine. And I let myself spiral into the old frustrated version of myself. I lost sight of all the amazing things in my life because I let the stress of that situation get the best of me. And when stress gets the best of you, it can completely take over your life. And it did for quite a while until I began to slowly take charge of my life again.
That challenging moment kept getting in my way as my self-limiting beliefs and negative thoughts took over my mind. It continued for a few months as I worked through those negative thoughts, feelings, and emotions. And as I dealt with the true root of the problem my awareness and clarity began to unveil itself. I have always known the root cause of our emotional shifts comes from deep in our past experiences. The emotional turmoil feels like it is the result of the current situation. But that deep sense of overwhelm and frustration stems from something way in our past that is embedded in our subconscious mind. These overwhelming emotions usually stem from our past childhood and adolescent experiences that were never processed or resolved thoroughly. And I have worked through many but the subconscious mind always needs attention.
I slowly regained my self-confidence, motivation, and drive. But the journey back was dreadful and I know it was my choice to allow that to take place. I could have responded differently and ended the torment quickly. Thankfully, my reputation for great customer service, kindness, and compassion prevailed. And that dreadful day slowly disappeared from my mind.
Actually my childhood was all a blur and I know now it is because I was always stuck in the fight or flight response.
In that moment of intense anxiety, stress and overwhelm; I was stuck in emotions from the past. I was processing emotions from my childhood as a Special needs child. Most people don’t realize that I had a Learning Disability. They can’t believe that a successful Nurse and Educator could possibly have had learning challenges. But I did and the journey was not easy. I worked hard to get out of special classes and eventually graduate with honors from High school and college. But my unprocessed emotions from my childhood were hidden far away in my subconscious mind. I honestly had no memory or recollection of my experiences as a special needs child. Actually my childhood was all a blur and I know now it is because I was always stuck in the fight or flight response. I spent most of my life stuck in this dreadful state of overwhelm and my health declined progressively till I took charge in my 30s. The stress response was always in motion for me creating havoc on my body physically and emotionally. Just to paint a little picture of what stress can do to your body. I had lost half of my hair by my 20s. I had severe digestive issues that eventually required surgery and multiple prescriptions. I had chronic pain and numbness that began in High school. And my health was at a point of crisis in my mid-30s.
Now let’s jump back to the experiences with self-limiting beliefs as a special needs child. I honestly had no recollection of my experiences as a special needs child until the dust settled after the incident in November. I realized that all those intense emotions had nothing to do with the situation at hand. But rather my physical and emotional response mirrored my childhood when I was bullied for being different. I was teased and picked on because it took me longer to take tests. I was teased because math and reading were harder for me. I was ridiculed because I was different from everyone else. I was isolated because I was the girl that had to leave the mainstream class to go to several special classes during the day. I was made fun of because I was bigger and more voluptuous than girls my age. I was under so much stress due to this emotional turmoil and frustration that I had completely blocked most of my childhood memories. As a means of protection, my mind literally shut down and hid most of my childhood memories, even the good ones.