Restoring Trust

It’s said that trust takes years to earn but can be lost in an instant. Frankly, that doesn’t ring absolutely true to me. I’m not sure a healthy definition of trust is that fragile.

And yet…

I’ve been on the receiving and delivering end of broken trust. I’ve experienced the suffering that can come from either side firsthand and with some frequency.

When trust is broken, it can break us. We can become bitter, depressed, or filled with despair. If you have been in an intimate relationship, you have experienced this.

But it’s also possible to reframe a violation of trust as an opportunity to be broken open–a chance to embrace the folly of overinvestment in something profoundly fraught.

Human beings are fascinating and fickle. This is true of me and true of you.

Yes, broken trust can break us. But if we work through the initial pain and suffering and surrender to being broken open, we can also nurture grace, resilience, and redemption. Our grief will subside, and we can become more compassionate toward others and ourselves.

Trust is a story. Choose your story, choose your future. When trust is broken, what story do you want to embrace?

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Scott Perry
Scott Perryhttps://www.creativeonpurpose.com/
I help difference-makers invested in social impact work embrace uncertainty and navigate adversity with greater equanimity. I'm a Difference-Maker Coach and author of Endeavor and Onward. I'm also the head coach in Seth Godin's Creative and Freelancer Akimbo Workshops. I'm a husband and father, go for a cemetery run every day, and quote Marcus Aurelius more often than I should. For over thirty years, I found and spread joy as a professional musician and guitar teacher while maintaining a happy marriage, homeschooling our sons, and taking care of business. My process employs principles and practices that are time-tested and scientifically vetted. I believe we enhance our lives most through endeavors that elevate others.


  1. This is a real good read and there is a lot one can agree with.
    Trust is one of the most important aspects in any type of relationship. Whether it is work, an emotional situation or simply a friendship, a relationship based on trust favors growth, comparison and results are obtained even faster.
    Trusting someone once again, despite the past, is not always easy, but not impossible.
    First of all, it is impossible to trust others again without first regaining control of your emotional well-being to find inner peace. Often, we tend to feel guilty because we have chosen to trust that person, but the fault is not ours. People make mistakes more often than you think, sometimes knowingly, sometimes unwittingly, this does not mean that what happened is the fault of those who gave that trust. Realizing this is the first step towards trusting again.
    In fact, the best way to overcome negative feelings is to embrace them. Repressing anger, sadness and pain is not the right way to be reborn. We need to live these sensations because they are part of our existence, to clarify, exercise compassion, overcome the past and, by welcoming even the negative aspects of existence, we can treasure them and become enriched as a person.