PUMPJACK – The Ozzfest 2k diaries, Chapter 6: Dime Time

_A short story in 12 chapters

A few hours go by and suddenly it’s time to get ready for the show at Trees.  We are all in rough shape. But Dime’s not done with me yet.  He’s like, “hey man, we gotta rocker you up.”  What’s that mean, Dime?

Next thing I know, Rita and Dime have me in one of their bathrooms, bent over the tub soaking my head, in preparation to get my hair dyed.  From the time I bent over the tub to wet my hair, I closed my eyes which they told me to do, and I felt hands on my head massaging the stuff on my head. Then I hear Dime say, in that deep gravelly voice, “OK, wait like 15 minutes and then wash that sh*t off”, and then I feel a rolled-up towel hit me in the side that he’d just thrown at me. The tub may have still been on, and I still had my eyes closed, and the dye was on my head, so I blindly reached up and turned off the water in the tub.

As I’m turning the valve off, I say, “man, Dime, this has been incredible, what a time – meeting you and your brother, and feeling the power of the crowd reacting to you on stage, and man, last night on the bus… dude, this has been awesome, thank you so much for being so cool to me. You too, Rita, you are just the best.”

To which I hear nothing in response.  I grab the towel, dry my face and open my eyes to discover they’re both long gone, back in the main room. (Cool, I’ll just stick my head in the toilet now.)

We all board the bus again and head to Trees.  There I am, “rockered up”, looking like a mental patient, with odd patches of bleach blond marks all around my head of short dark hair.  The time at Trees is a blur, but I remember one detail that of course, I’ll never forget. No Dime time on stage with us that night, but after the last song, I finished and put down my sticks, got up from the kit, and who do I see standing there… none other than Rex Brown. He says, “I’ve been watching, man. F’n solid.”  I said, “coming from you, Rex, I appreciate that, man, thanks a lot!!”  He said, “you’re welcome.  What happened to your head?”  I replied, “Well, your man, Dime, happened to my head.”

And ten minutes later, I was receiving a hug from Dime, saying goodbye, and being taxi’d back to the airport.  My rock-n-roll weekend was complete and I’d passed the brothers’ test.

Next Chapter: Reality Check


Ryan Maloney
Ryan Maloney
Ryan Maloney is a husband, bartender, caregiver, drummer, and former online advertising professional. In addition to writing and drumming, Ryan enjoys cooking for and entertaining friends as well as going to the beach and traveling the world. He lives in Ft. Lauderdale with his main squeeze, John. Though born and raised in Chicago, Il until the age of 14, Ryan considers his true hometown to be Phoenix, AZ. Ryan spent over 30 years in Arizona, starting in 1985 at Cortez High School. From there, community college and ASU followed, but all the while, Ryan was drumming up a frenzy in local heavy metal bands. His late teens saw his main band, TYNATOR, achieve a small amount of local success, as well as release a cd to the European market. The opportunity of a lifetime came in 2000, which provided the basis for one of his writing series', PUMPJACK - The Ozzfest 2k diaries. The 12 chapter series documents the meeting of two friends, and then the events that led up to the band, PUMPJACK, heading out on the annual summer Ozzfest tour in 2000, in which the band had been invited to participate, as well as some memories of some of the individual city tour stops.After the tour, Ryan began what then became a 15 year career in online advertising. Having left the corporate world behind in 2017, Ryan now enjoys serving drinks to thirsty customers in Wilton Manors, Florida.

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