A busy mind can lead to where there is little clarity, decision making is hasty and outcomes are not as desired.
We are bombarded with noise from technology and an incessant need to be doing something. Some people believe if you are not “busy” then you are being lazy. This is far from the truth.
There is a lot of skill and calculated strategy that occurs in silent observation and in a pause. The power of a pause can be measured by the ultimate success of which out of the silence comes direct action creating a forward movement for a positive result.
Why is it so difficult for us to pause?
Silence can be deafening. We are not used to silence and taking a time out from the distractions. However, if you were to start practicing taking a pause, you will find amazing transformation in your experiences.
When are good times to pause?
If you have to make a hard decision, either personal or professional
When you are angry, a pause can help diffuse the anger giving you a new perspective
Getting rid of the mind loops to gain more clarity
Digest information you have been given before responding
Setting boundaries with others
Building confidence
When you want to get back on track
Reflecting on the past in order to be more present
Shift away from judgment to understanding
Courage to speak up, say what you really want to say without fear of another’s response
Introspection for personal and professional growth
Prior to taking action to ensure it is done from a place of assurance and strength
It can be like stepping into unknown territory if you have never taken the time to pause. Your mind may fight you and resist your desire to go into a pause. Take as much time as you need, you will be retraining your brain to welcome the silence.
Information and insights will fill in the empty space that comes with the pause. The power behind the silence is coming from your internal compass. That part of you holding all that you have learned and experienced up to this point in your life.
We all have an innate knowing of what direction we want to go, what feels good in our decision making, the gut feelings we either follow or ignore and the nudges we feel from time to time. The pause is a doorway to letting go and receiving, allowing for better decision making and outcomes.
Below is a list of some feelings that may surface as you practice the power of the pause. I have given an opposing word that you can replace each word with a more positive feeling.
Frustration…………….. Happiness
Unfairness……………… Equitable
Stress…………………… Relaxed
Anger…………………… Calmness
Jealousy……………….. Trusting
Fear…………………….. Confidence
Pausing will only work if you are open to change and willing to let go of how you currently respond to situations and people. Part of personal and professional development is the understanding that you are not the same person today you were yesterday. Every day that goes by, you have more wisdom and knowledge.
The key is what you do with the information.
Do you stay where you are or do you consider potential and possibilities? Taking just three weeks and testing the power of the pause can give you a taste of the strength in this simple yet powerful technique. Give it try and let me know how it works for you!
“The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.”
I try to never talk to anyone at work or in my personal live until I have some time to pause and absorb what they said to me. Often we life re actively rather taking the time to truly understand what has been said.
Yesterday, I put my cell phone on the coffee table. And was about to head out. My wife asked why I wasn’t bringing my phone. I asked, who’d she think would call me? She said she didn’t know, but it was a good idea to have my phone.
Our cell phones have gotten to the point that there are another organ that prevents us from taking some time to think.
Chris,
Yes, it seems we have become attached to technology to the point that we have lost touch with the ability to be without – in silence. It is like a craving in which the satisfaction meter keeps rising and we are not meeting the needs of the craving the more we feed it. As well as thinking everything is an “emergency” and therefore we “have” to have our phones with us.
A week at a retreat with no technology can be beneficial to reset oneself. But the question would be, if one could maintain balance after the reset.
For me, it is all about choice….choosing to pause, be in silence and see/understand the benefits it brings. I hope you enjoyed being without your phone and gained something from the time in technology silence. ((smiling))
One time I was designing content for a leadership course. I was asked if it was possible to compress this weekly course so it could be completed in less time. Sure, I said we can compress it. We can compress it to half the time because it takes us about half a week to reflect on our selves, our behaviors, and our connection to the world.
Then I was asked if the course could be compressed even more. Sure, I said. We’ll need a bright lamp, a car battery, and a pair of electrodes. That’s the extreme we’ll need to take to compress the course even further.
Chris,
Amazing how people want to compress things into such tight spaces….leaves no room for expansion. Interesting analogy…the car battery one made me chuckle! In reality, sometimes it does come to a jolt for those who don’t take the time to pause.
All good times to pause. I would add one other. As you note, people are uncomfortable with silence. I learned many years ago that by being silent, the other person (s) will begin to talk. The less you say, the more he/she says. To break the silence they will tell you things they never intended to say.
Ken, thank you for the add. I agree, others will both say things not intended or will start to feel uncomfortable. Those who are passive/aggressive will play mind games to throw you off guard. In order to respond- not react- going silent to gather your thoughts and cause them to back down takes the wind out of their sail. They may attack back, but this is now a good time to validate whatever is behind their attack. In our silence, we can be calm and not get flustered from the chaos of the “noise.” I have found the pause to be invaluable in many different situations both for my own personal needs and when in communication with others.