“Creation, Expansion Beyond Belief, and Receiving ALL the Happy that Comes My Way…HAPPINESS—Yess, More Please!!!”
The above words began coming through to me in bits and pieces towards the latter part of 2023. Unsure why, but feeling strong urges to write them down as they floated about my head, I created a section in my notes app and titled it ‘Musings for 2024’. Flash forward to today and I am beyond grateful that I did—as they comprise my mantra for the year, my invitation to party with the Universe.
Exploding with excitement is how I can best describe my life in 2024 thus far. And we are just getting started, my friends! Several fabulous, creative opportunities have presented themselves seamlessly and sequentially since the beginning of January. From the publication of my third multi-author book to my presentation in the May installment of 360° Nation’s InsteadTALKS, my heart and mind keep circling back to my celebratory invite from the Universe. What delightful gifts have I been able to receive from such a generous and gracious host!
Along with my amazing adventures in the creative sphere, I’ve been recently miraculously blessed in the physical realm. True expansion and growth beyond belief have been witnessed in my body in such a short time frame. I’ll briefly share some highlights from the past twenty-seven years of chronic health issues to provide background context.
All hell broke loose in 1997 when three infectious diseases decided to wreak havoc upon my immune system. Their presence evolved into a severe case of Fibromyalgia, which would rear its ugly head in flare ups of extreme fatigue and joint pains. Flares would come and go and could last anywhere from a few weeks to several months.
One day in 2009, I experienced a flare that never subsided. The extreme levels of fatigue and joint pains amped up quite a few notches as I lost my ability to walk and many of my mental faculties. I’d been starting to manage my symptoms well enough with meds, aqua physical therapy, and mental/emotional therapy with a social worker, until 2013–when I was diagnosed with a severe nervous system disorder called CRPS (Complex Regional Pain Syndrome).
Symptoms of CRPS include, but are not limited to, the following: (1) Continuous burning or throbbing pain, usually in the arm, leg, hand, or foot, (2) Sensitivity to touch or cold, (3) Swelling of the painful area, (4) Changes in skin temperature—altering between sweaty and cold, (5) Changes in skin color, ranging from white and blotchy to red or blue, (6) Changes in skin texture, which may become tender, thin, or shiny in the affected area, (7) Changes in hair and nail growth, (8) joint stiffness, swelling, and damage, (9) Muscle spasms, tremors, and weakness (atrophy), and (10) Decreased ability to move the affected body part.
In my case, the whole body was affected and was experiencing all the symptoms above and more. It was curving over itself and hardening into the fetal position. Nerves were so tightly wound up that the muscles and joints were stiffened to the point that there was no voluntary control over movement. The nerves were so sensitive that the body couldn’t tolerate physical touch of any kind. I spent an entire year (2013-2014) in bed with this condition and had some bone damage done to the feet. It was thought I would never move or walk independently again.
A fabulous five-day outpatient treatment of ketamine infusions proved the difference! Movement in my toes was possible the first night and I was completely pain free after the treatment was over—ready to start building up body strength and endurance. I’ve had several CRPS flare ups since 2014 and the ketamine infusions have resolved each one.
Since my last rounds of ketamine in 2021, I have continuously been building back my body strength, endurance, mental, and spiritual health—striving to be the healthiest version of me that I possibly can. And until a particular party with the Universe, which I attended in mid-March, this version of me could exist (from day to day) in a variety of phases. At my very worst, my mobility depended solely on the wheelchair. At my very best, I shuffle-walked around the house without the aid of assistive devices, used a rolling walker for short outings, and relied on the wheelchair for long ones.
So now that you know where I was, you’ll soon be able to see how drastically my physical life has changed upon accepting the Universe’s invitation in mid-March to party in Sedona, Arizona on my first retreat!
I must confess that the Sedona Retreat was just one of many firsts included in that mid-March party thrown by the Universe—which provided for so much growth, expansion, and receipt of HAPPINESS. For starters, it was the first time I had flown in an airplane since 2018 and the first time I was not being accompanied by my parents. My dear friend and retreat host agreed to be my travel buddy to and from the festivities.
And boy was the entire flight experience a gift—a complete contrast to my previous plane rides. Never in my life, even before I became ill, had an airport been a place where I found joy. The crowds, the stress, and the waiting or rushing about had never been what I considered pleasant. And this feeling only evolved to one of dread, once my illness began. Typically, I would have to take an anti-anxiety medication before I even left the house and then arm myself with earplugs and noise-canceling headphones because of intense sensory overload. Then my parents would push the wheelchair through the airport, as I kept my head down and my eyes to the floor. TSA (Transportation Security Administration) would scan my bags, body, and wheelchair and I’d be asleep before we even boarded the plane.
But NOT this time!!!
Upon arrival at the airport, my friend enquired how best to assist me through the whole process. I honestly wasn’t sure because I hadn’t flown in so long. After making the decision to use my wheelchair as a walker and push my carry-on bags as far and as long as I was able, I asked my friend to roll my big bag to the check-in counter. Then I stated, “Let’s see what happens.”
What happened next was a fabulous encounter with the most delightful man at bag-check. He did his job with a smile and joked with us while answering any questions we had. When finished, he even offered some advice about how to maneuver around the airport and TSA pre-check with the wheelchair. My friend and I made our way to the pre-check area and after the formalities, it was time for a break. So I sat in the wheelchair, enjoyed pleasant conversation with my friend until our plane arrived, and then settled into a nice nap once the plane took off.
“Let’s see what happens” should be added to my 2024 mantra. It truly defined the essence of the entire Sedona Retreat trip. It also solidified my acceptance to party with the Universe and opened my heart, mind, body, spirit, and eyes to the endless bounty of gifts that it provides.
Upon arrival in Sedona, I voiced those words, “Let’s see what happens” in response to my friend as we began a hike up a hill near her home. She and another friend provided not only the utmost emotional support, but also gave me the physical support I required to make it up that hill. After numerous breaks, between me shuffling my feet up the mound and leaning on each friend for balance and stability, I finally reached the summit.
Another fabulous first and gift presented by my dearest companion, the Universe!!!
Around the second or third day of the retreat, things started to get very interesting. It was as if the Universe had raised the volume level of the music at the party and wanted me to start dancing—or at least walking. One of the fabulous females attending the retreat happened to be a healer and massage therapist. “Out of the blue” she approached me—with a glimmer in her eyes—and asked if she could “work on” my right foot. Apparently it had been calling out to her. So I said, “Sure. Let’s see what happens.”
A few gentle snap-crackle-pops later, I noticed a warm, energized, and flowing sensation in my foot. It was as if something that had been “stuck” there was finally gone. Immediately after she was done massaging my foot and I got up from the couch, I realized I could stand flat on both feet. It had been at least ten years since I was able to perform this task due to the bone loss and deformity in my right foot.
Let’s hear it for another fantastic first and full-on miracle!!!
Well, the Universe didn’t stop there. While preparing for our hike the next day, I discovered I could lift my right foot while moving forward. This allowed for me to take actual steps independently, without having to shuffle my feet.
Another feat that was at least ten years in the making!!!
I’m not going to lie, it was awkward and my balance was really off. It was as if I was navigating a new pair of legs. But I was F*cking walking unassisted!
To put into perspective the gravity of this experience, I will flash forward several days—after the retreat was over. My friends and I returned to the hill that we climbed upon my initial arrival into Sedona. This experience was like night and day. No breaks were required to regain my energy or strength and I climbed the hill completely on my own! My heart was overflowing with gratitude, excitement, and celebration for the gracious gifts being presented by the Universe.
And the presents kept coming. The weekend following the retreat offered another first for me to experience—The Hay House I Can Do It Conference. This was a grand experiment, indeed, for it had been at least fifteen years since I had attended an in-person event—surrounded by all those people in one space for any length of time. But again, “Let’s see what happens” played over and over in my head and in my heart.
And what happened was spectacular!!!
Using the wheelchair as a walker, I was able to navigate the Phoenix Convention Center—at my own pace—as I watched several beloved inspirational keynote speakers and attended numerous break-out-sessions of joy, love, and positivity over the course of the three-day event. When I was tired, I napped—which really only happened on Saturday because we started the day so early. And just like the airport, the entire experience was most delightful and completely contrasted my encounters with crowds and intense environments over the course of my chronic health journey.
In the past, after several hours of activity in a day, I’d come home in severe pain and utter exhaustion, having to rest the entire next day…Not this time! Previously, I would have needed to arm myself with both earplugs and noise-canceling headphones to drown out the crowd…Nope, not necessary! Back in the day, I would have avoided this in-person event AT ALL COSTS for fear of how it might negatively trigger my health conditions. However…these three days at the Hay House I Can Do It Conference were an absolute blast!
All of these amazing adventures that took place in Sedona, mid-March, happened because of several key factors. I freed myself from expectations, became curious about the opportunities that arose before me, opened myself to embrace the experiences that I encountered, and allowed myself to receive all the HAPPINESS and goodness that was available to me. Upon this realization, it occurred to me that the fabulous party thrown by the Universe in Sedona, Arizona did not have to end. For every moment everywhere was an invitation to come party with the Universe—I just had to accept!
Since the download of my 2024 mantra and grasping its great significance—through experiencing such spectacular synchronistic events, gifts, and miracles both creatively and physically—I have decided to embrace each moment for what it truly is…the Universe offering me a chance to attend the most amazing party with the most stunning array of gifts imaginable! And the best part is, this proposition isn’t exclusively mine—We ALL are Welcomed to the Party!!!
Have You Accepted Your Invite???
