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Love Found New Ways to Love

During the last three months, I have listened closely and channeled gentle ocean waves of unconditional love and compassion to parts of myself-especially Unworthy Ursula and Terrified Tammy. Together they showed up as the Exiled One holding layers of spoken and unspoken traumas I endured and continue to heal/transform.

During a transformative dream I had– a child enthusiastically greeted me at the bottom of the road where I live here in Black Mountain. The child then ran up the curvy mountain road joyously hollering, “Laura’s Here! Laura’s Here! Laura’s Here!” I woke up in tears.

In an astonishing, transformative somatic session with a gifted Somatic Experiencing practitioner, I unburdened my Exiled One of so many of the hurts she had carried and welcomed home Laura of 2022.

In the experience of my boundaries being impeccably honored in the House of Joy and observing new individual actions Paul began taking for his individual growth-especially after his scary bout with Covid, I started to rediscover Paul. We both continue rediscovering Us. Our love for each other which had grown in the five years of being together became the backdrop for deeper healing, growth, and evolution-individually and together. We continue to have astonishing, brave, vulnerable, heartfelt conversations and are currently being graciously supported, affirmed, and guided by a couple who are gifted in hearing, valuing, seeing, and gently guiding us as individuals and in our couple dynamic. We are learning life-enriching skills, fresh, heartfelt ways to connect with emotional consent.

Paul and I also listened to and discussed the Unlocking Us Podcast with Brene Brown and the Gottmans. They offer honest, vulnerable, and practical guidance for turning towards each other with love and caring. To my delight, Paul gifted me a copy of The Love Prescription and he got himself a copy of the book, too. We’ll both dive in separately and engage the practical ideas-which include many we already had been doing! Paul asked for other personal/spiritual growth resources from me-which I happily shared-including Super Soul Sunday episodes on YouTube and the podcast, We Can Do Hard Things.

Experiencing enduring safety, belonging, and worthiness in being- body, mind, heart, and soul inside a home and with other people-especially an intimate partner-remains an unfolding, brave, and vulnerable process. Becoming an emotionally safe person requires tools and practices. Rebuilding trust with an intimate partner who is becoming an even more emotionally safe person takes time and focused commitment. Courage, self-compassion, compassion for another, loving-kindness, and grace-a radiant foundation inside yourself and a bridge to build and nurture with others.

As my daughter stated it, “Mom, being unconditionally loved and accepted by another person can be terrifying.” And may one of those people become You with all your younger selves AND a beloved person (or maybe more!) during your lifetime. And may your experience of receiving love and offering love become less terrifying and over time a magnificent, miraculous pathway, a courageous purpose worthy of your life energy.

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Laura Staley
Laura Staleyhttp://www.cherishyourworld.com
The founder of Cherish Your World, Laura Staley passionately helps people thrive by guiding them to a holistic transformation of space, heart, mind, body, and soul. Laura knows that there’s a relationship between the conditions of our homes or workplaces and the quality of our lives. Trained and certified with the Western School of Feng Shui and seasoned by almost two decades of working with a variety of clients, Laura uses her intuition and expertise to empower her clients to produce remarkable results in their lives. Her trifecta of serving people includes speaking, writing, and compassionate listening. As a columnist, Laura writes personal essays focused on self-discovery, feng shui, emotional health, and transformations from the inside out. Laura is the published author of three books: Live Inspired, Let Go Courageously and Live with Love: Transform Your Life with Feng Shui, and the Cherish Your World Gift Book of 100 Tips to Enhance Your Home and Life. Prior to creating her company, Laura worked as a fulltime parent and an assistant professor at Ohio Wesleyan University. She earned a Ph.D. in political science from The Ohio State University. Her joys in life include laughing with loved ones, dancing, reading, meditating, running, being in nature, and listening to music she loves. She resides in Black Mountain, NC with lovable dog, Layla. Laura is a contributing author to the inspiring book Crappy to Happy: Sacred Stories of Transformational Joy

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