Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
When my twenty-two-year marriage ended, I created “Laura Staley, Single, Happy, Free.” This motto or vision became my inspiration that got me out of bed in the morning and singing “A dream that will need all the love you can give, every day of your life, for as long as you live.” from Rogers and Hammerstein, The Sound of Music. I became totally motivated by who I could become, that I could finally be free of the long-term emotional pain, the internal to my psyche and external conflicts that had persisted and been fueled in part by my own unhealthy co-dependent ways and words. I knew I had to dive even deeper and break free from limiting beliefs that choked the life of my being. When I remembered to eat, I ate courage for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
This declaration created a future I could become in the present moment. Besides, we know from neuroscience that the brain goes where we focus our attention. I noticed I became happy, free in the “going through.” I also wept buckets and buckets of tears throughout this personal painful time of constant storms both huge and small. I used the expression “F the F-ing, F-er” a great deal with my closest friends who had not really ever heard me drop the “F” bomb. Simultaneously, something became unleashed, emancipated from deep inside of me.
At this juncture, I did not want to be labeled by anyone.
Besides I cannot stand labels. I did not ever want to become just a survivor of anything and I have come through a great deal. There are too many containers to stuff and label. They would take up an entire grocery shelf that currently needs to be available for toilet paper, lots of healthy food, masks, gloves, and disinfectant.
Rather than surviving, is it possible to become people who thrive, who engage the pre-frontal cortex of conscious, thoughtful choices even in the midst of chaos and change?
What if we could apply a declaration to our current situation like Vibrantly Healthy, Connected and Clear or Creative, Curious, and Contributing or Deeply Vulnerable, Real, and Compassionate.
Who can we become during this chaotic crucible of persistent, ever-changing stormy seas of challenge, implode, disruption, and change?
So many people are dying while simultaneously I believe something is being born deep inside of the psyche and souls of human beings.
May we take the time to create a vision that inspires us to wake up full of vigor and vitality even as our hearts continue to break wide and forever open.