The need to grow is one of the higher level needs that every human being needs to satisfy. If he hadn’t had this seed inside him, we probably wouldn’t still have the fire, or the wheel.
We truly achieve our goals not when we avoid difficulties, but when we learn to face them, without shortcuts and without being discouraged by some disappointment.
For some time it seems that parents of the latest generations often tend to clear the path of their children from all possible and imaginable difficulties.
Skills, instead, are acquired by facing difficulties.
Self-confidence is not a gift but is given to us by the experiences faced, by the large and small problems solved. Everyday life is the gym where we acquire the skills to face the challenges that will be proposed to us.
If young people are prevented from facing difficulties, they are prevented from becoming people capable of facing them, from being able to make conscious choices, from building their own self-esteem and the necessary resilience.
Difficulties are nothing more than training for our goals. They are what strengthens us, what strengthens our skills, our resilience, our willpower, the spirit of sacrifice.
Those preparing to face a super competitive world must be trained to rely on their own resources and not to give up too easily. Because there are no overly ambitious goals, there are only people who give up.
It is evident that, if not trained, the person’s skills are then insufficient and lacking in dealing with the complexity of life.
Emerging and burning problems within the couple, the family, parenthood, among young people and last but not least in the school and its ability to train people to face real life, indicate with unmistakable alarm signals that something must be done , because what is achieved does not seem to be enough to slow down, much less stop the ongoing decline.
In our society it is often not understood what the study and growth of personal skills actually are. Many mistakenly believe that it is not necessary at all, believing that transmission through osmosis within the family bubble is sufficient to develop full life competence and mastery of personal skills.
This probably corresponded to reality just a few generations ago. In the last century things have changed suddenly and the number of personal skills and the complexity of the skills necessary for a fulfilling and successful life have grown dramatically. Young people will have to face a world quite different from the one inherited from their parents, and mothers and fathers have difficulty transmitting how to live correctly, because the world they know no longer exists by the time their children have to conquer it.
The growing numbers of these problems should make understand that learning to face difficulties and obstacles is the only way to equip young people with the tools capable of building a better style and quality of life that is more in line with today’s needs.
Parents must prepare their children to become a conscious adult, not crush him with worries about the future or continue to treat him like a defenseless child, they have the duty to give him all the tools to face this complex world.
Families and schools should collaborate by working on relationship skills, expression skills and life skills in general, all of which are necessary for young people to have autonomy and existential success.
Unfortunately, the topic is extremely topical.
Recent news tells us about teenagers in disarray, violent and arrogant. Lovers of excess and tied to the pack, even if individualistic and tending to be cynical. This is worrying news, also because it seems we are witnessing an escalation of rather serious episodes. Often those who pay the price for these impromptu and unpredictable attacks are the weakest or some unfortunate person on duty.
Experts argue that the root of these irrational explosions of violence is in the discomfort, increased after the restrictions experienced during the pandemic, and in the lack of prospects. The clash gives the thrill of transgression, the delirium of omnipotence and also that visibility that we crave so much. For this reason, more and more frequently, public places have become the scene of fights or disturbing gatherings. Family and school also have their responsibilities. Many parents have lost their role and educational skills within a family unit that is increasingly in crisis.
This is a timely and important post, Aldo
Of significance is “If young people are prevented from facing difficulties, they are prevented from becoming people capable of facing them, from being able to make conscious choices, from building their own self-esteem and the necessary resilience.”
This is very true. I know of few cases here where spoiled kids grew up and then inherited millions of dollars. The money was gone in few years.
One case is a private hospital that became one of the top hospitals. The father invested his life in making t a respected and highly favored hospital. Few years ago the father died. The hospital does not exist.
Easy come easy go is true.
We need to train our kids at young ages to be responsible. This serves their future