Just a Thought on Grandparents

Tales Of Nightingale Lynn[su_dropcap style=”flat”]N[/su_dropcap]OT ALL OF US women or men are cut out to be parents, or grandparents. God chooses our family for us, we do not choose them, for if we did, how many would quickly look for trade-ins, if there was such a thing, imagine, one can only imagine.

Grandparents are truly a gift in many ways. Generations change, times change.

As a young single mother of barely 22 in the early 70’s, and a wife at 18 of a man who served 3 tours in Viet Nam, I was use to the independence based on what upbringing my dysfunctional childhood had prepared me for. I had no connection throughout my life with my grandparents, only remembering the brief meeting of my father’s mother at the age of 10. I knew at an early age that I wanted to be a mother and a grandmother someday, and not just the average, only the best.

HEART_SAND_BEACHWhat’s amazing to me, is that now at the age of 66 and a grandmother of 4, I hold in my heart a certain fondness for the grandparents I never knew, wishing that I had, and hoping that my grandchildren, with what I have provided to them in only 3 ½ short years, that they will remember me as good, kind, fun, loving, smart, talented, but more importantly, my love for my faith, and my love for them.

You see, my grandchildren have been cut from my life as my daughter and her husband no longer wish me to be a part of their lives, no interaction with my grandchildren. This comes as a basis that says, as a grandparent, you’re not important, and have nothing substantial to offer any longer.

As a young woman, I made choices I could have made better, and as a mother, I could have done things differently; however, I knew that I did the best at the time, and no mother has a play-by-play handbook when children are brought into the world. I understand anger, I lived with it for a long time, and I understand resentment, but the longevity of these two emotions, I don’t understand, when God is supposed to be a part of your every day life. One cannot say they love God and then isolate parents or grandparents, short of abusiveness beyond understanding, or murder, or death.

I take full responsibility for all that I have done not acceptable, and I ask only for forgiveness. I hold no anger or hatred towards anyone, and I don’t. I know that this life is short, a temporary place of residence that will end someday.

Think about it, after the passing of about the fourth generation, will I be remembered or thought of? Perhaps. Perhaps a green leaf will pop up in some day should my generational grandchildren decide to explore.

Regardless of all the above, Grandparents are important, and they have much to offer in Wisdom and life’s experience to grandchildren’s lives. If I was going to say anything it would be this….If your grandparents are not insane, don’t have a criminal record, not meddlers, but just have the normal everyday ups and downs in life that come with age, don’t isolate them from your lives or the children’s lives. Someday we will be where they are, if we live long enough. Wouldn’t it be nice to go out of this world feeling loved and appreciated for all that you gave? I think so.

I am a firm believer in Christ that if you love as HE asks us to love, this too shall pass.



Lynn Forrester-Pitocco
Lynn Forrester-Pitocco
LYNN is Retired from Law Enforcement as a Police Officer, with a background in nursing and previously a member of the Search and Rescue Team with the Los Angeles Sheriff’s Department, A retired member of the Orange Police Department, she became the first female SWAT member on an elite team while becoming a member of the Olympic Shooting Team during the early years on the department. A mother and a grandmother, a devout Catholic who currently resides in Houston, Texas. Her hobbies include writing, painting, and a contemplative prayer life. She is in love with her faith, but the love she carries for her two grown children and grandchildren who rest in her heart surpasses everything except her faith in God. Since retirement, Lynn has done private investigation, worked as a gang counselor with middle schools, A member of Bl. Mother Teresa’s Order called the (Lay Missionaries of Charity), she is also a pro-life advocate, often called upon to give testimony and speak to youth groups, as well as adult forums. She has published a children’s book entitled “The Children’s Garden” and is currently working on two additional children’s books. She is currently working on the major one focused on her experience in Law Enforcement entitled “Heels and a Badge”. (copyright). Her paintings and sketches, writings, can be viewed on her Pinterest boards (click on the Pinterest ICON below). Her dream is to one-day write a movie for Hallmark. Dreams do come true … See Lynn’s entire collection of thought-provoking Articles by clicking on her byline. Lynn is a contributing author to the inspiring book Chaos to Clarity: Sacred Stories of Transformational Change.

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  1. Dear sweet Lynn, and I say that with total confidence that you are a sweet grandmother. We have so many similarities. I had 3 children by age 22 but had a husband. I had a grandmother whom I saw once or maybe twice a year until I was 12 years old. I adored her and she adored me. I wish we could talk because I know in my deepest heart the pain you have. I think it will be OK if I share a link to a blog I wrote when my daughter and son-in-law cut me out of their life – I prayed so hard and believed strongly that God would change their hearts, and even though they don’t have the same faith that I have, they did reconcile. I pray the same for you. I am now very involved in my granddaughter and grandson’s lives. When I envisioned my life as a grandmother, I wanted to be like Grandma Windnagle. Who is she? I wrote about her here.

  2. I pray that your beloved grandkids will someday reach out to you Lynn when their parents will not be an obstacle. Love conquers all! Your strong faith in our savior is a wonderful testimony and serves as a becon of hope for others who have been abandoned by loved ones!