What Roots Feed the Blaming Epidemic?
Editor’s Note: See Part One of Devaney’s Series HERE
[su_dropcap style=”flat”]W[/su_dropcap]HEN LEADERS ALLOW “The Ugly” to continually prance its lying deceitfulness among the crowd, the best interests and well-being of everyone else is trampled. Furthermore, why would the carrier of “The Ugly” want to continue being a nasty carrier? Oftentimes, there are simple, yet sad reasons that include:
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Fear of Loss of Control: while common sense tells us that we cannot control people and situations, fear is a crude taskmaster who perpetuates lies every day. Fear that is driven by deep insecurities will drag around the proverbial comfort blanket of a heavy bag full of donkey tails. Fear produces panic about the loss of control. Therefore, anyone who speaks across the barrier between fear’s lies and truth’s reality is fair game for being infected with some blaming donkey tails! The real ugly “Who” has a lot of false power.
Refusal to Change Self: while most people know the personal behavioral areas they need to address, more people need to take responsibility and time to do the inner work of change. It is far easier to sling the puss of infected, sick behavior all over everyone else than it is to take the proverbial medicine that brings heart healing – the medicine of self-denial and honesty. The real ugly “Who” has a lot of false power.
Denial of Truth: life has a way of stacking up defeats, losses, tragic events, and downright unjust occurrences when we refuse to deal with them. When someone hides their head in the sands of Fantasyland, refusing to deal with reality and truth, their collective brokenness becomes a breeding ground for epidemic bad behavior. Hurting people hurt people. Angry people anger people. Shame-filled people shame people. And, lying people lie about other people. The real ugly “Who” has a lot of false power.[/message][su_spacer]
Within each of these simple, yet sad reasons for continually serving as a carrier for “The Ugly”, there is a common thread: helplessness. When an adult feels helpless, the associated behaviors generally include a lot of slinging of nastiness. The most common nastiness includes the use of the blaming donkey tails. The very action of blaming provides the helpless person a false feeling of being in control – right back to operating within the confines of their lies. Unashamedly, their blame-game has a way of wrapping their insecurities in the fake blanket of counterfeit control. In reality, the insecure person is woefully out of control – both from within and from without!
Wrapping Up This Blame Thing
Blame has never, ever solved a single problem in the C-Suites of Fortune 500 companies; across the expanse of the business spectrum; in the smallest Mom and Pop shops; in the sacred pulpits of our churches; nor in the makeshift boardrooms and private bedrooms of our homes.
Yet, when leaders focus on the value, needs, and challenges of their people resources first, there is the opportunity to connect the power of responsibility with productive plans. This is because considering the best interests of people always provides a better probability for success within any process plans. As we know, processes work toward producing effective outcomes (over and over and over again), as this relates to an organization’s products and services. And, processes defined within a plan produce accountability; another quality that “The Ugly” vehemently dislikes. Accountability always puts a stop to the blaming donkey tail activity.
Interestingly, the same principle works beautifully within the heart of “The Ugly”. This is because the principle of connecting the power of responsibility with productive plans is wrapped up tightly in facts and reality – the truth. Ah, truth is a powerful cure and it will eventually win every time. Yet the cure requires leaders who will refuse to tolerate the epidemic behavior of “The Ugly”, in favor of embracing the power of responsibility. Hey, someone must stand up and speak truth into brokenness – even if it is from the safest possible vantage point. As a leader, be certain you are inoculated against the spewing barrage of lies that will grossly flow your way!
Oh, one more truth: there are three things that are embodied in breaking a behavioral epidemic – the Way (the plan), the Truth (facts and reality), and the Life-Light (creepy crawlers rarely thrive or survive in the Life-Light). Always Remember: nothing matters until the root matters of “The Ugly” are addressed at the root of “The (infectious) Who”. I guess it really is (in part) about “The Who”, just not the ones who are wearing all of the donkey tails!
Copyright 2016, Devaney Rae, L.L.C. All Rights Reserved.