[su_dropcap style=”flat”]I[/su_dropcap] WAS TRAVELING for business and had boarded my flight without experiencing any delays in getting through the airport security area and arriving at my departure gate on time. As I was settling into my assigned seat on the plane, I noticed that the cute little boy, who had been entertaining everyone in the gate area prior to boarding, was seated with his mom two rows ahead of me in the window seat. Through the openings in the seats in front of me, I had a clear view of him; and everyone in our section of the plane could hear him loud and clear.
As we slowly taxied on the runway prior to takeoff, he chattered about how great it was going to be to fly high, high up in the sky where he could almost touch Heaven. This cute Dennis the Menace look-alike embellished his story with great detail about what the pilot would do to get us all the way to Heaven. I’m not quite sure everyone within the sound of his voice appreciated his monologue on the wonders of flying to Heaven. Nevertheless, he continued on with his animated chattering about where and how he would fly if he were the pilot.
As the plane headed down the runway increasing in speed, his chatter came to a crescendo, and at liftoff he shouted with glee and threw both arms into the air. But as he visualized the plane rapidly rising into the sky, the sounds of gleefulness stopped abruptly, immediately to be replaced with screeching and sobbing. He clung to his mother, wailing, “But I don’t want to go to Heaven right now. I just wanted everyone to know all about it.”
Image courtesy of Pixabay
It’s All About Perspective
Our perspective is all about the way we interpret and understand something – especially how we interpret and understand our own self. Here’s the deal: right beneath the surface of our interpretation and understanding lies our mental impressions and emotional responses. For the most part, our mental impressions and emotional responses reveal what we really believe about something – regardless of what we say about our interpretation or understanding. In working with clients and visiting with friends, I often find myself saying (or wanting to say), “My friend, I know you believe that but it simply is not the truth.”
Interpretation and understanding are such abstract words in our very visual and interactive world. Could this be why it is so easy to lie about “Self-Truth”?
Like our Dennis the Menace look-alike, when it comes to our perspective on “Self”, maybe perspective’s abstractness is part of the reason it is so conveniently easy to gloss over what we know deep down inside is our “Self-Truth”.
Our Dennis the Menace look-alike had a “Self-Truth” that clearly knew he was not experienced in knowing the way to Heaven; nor was he ready to make his literal way to Heaven. Even so, he was well-able to gain the rapt attention of too many adults – even with what was clearly a tall tale wrapped up in a very false scenario.
Glossing Over “Self-Truth”
Maybe the glossing over of what one knows deep down inside is their “Self-Truth” is a lie. Do otherwise intelligent, capable, and successful adults really lie to themselves?
Well, maybe it’s not really lying; maybe it’s only name-calling about “the what” and “the why” of root changes one needs to make.
The glossing over name-calling goes something like this:
- One focuses on the visual picture in their mind that describes the way they want or need something or someone to be (“the what” of perspective).
- One’s thoughts and behavior about something or toward someone are fed by their visual mental picture (“the what” of perspective).
- From that self-serving visual picture, one releases their emotional responses upon others – usually in a way that distracts others from the root issues of the name-caller’s “Self-Truth” (“the why” of perspective).
- After a time, most people on the receiving end of the name-caller’s self-serving false scenarios begin to see patterns in the name-caller’s behavior (facts and reality that defy the lies of one’s “Self-Truth” perspective).
- Yet when others try to interject facts and reality into the self-serving false scenarios (“one’s perspective”), the name-caller again proceeds to flood others with “the what” and “the why” of perspective’s false scenarios and “Self-Truth” (a.k.a. lies).
Now, press “Repeat”, again and again and again, because this is how exhausting it is trying to convince someone of the falsehood in their “Self-Truth” lying perspective. My friend, I know you believe that but it simply is not the truth.
Most people continue lying to themselves through their false perspective because the core changes they need to make come down to this:
Thoughts and Behaviors Must Shift from
Self-Serving to Transparent Honesty and Truth.
Maybe it is easier to call one’s own creepy crawlers by every other name, other than what they really are! Maybe it hurts less to interpret and understand one’s bad habits, one’s emotional immaturity, and one’s blame-game as something other than what they really are. After all, that kind of ongoing pattern of behavior certainly seems to protect one’s power, authority, reputation, and position. My friend, I know you believe that but it simply is not the truth.
Wrapping Up This Perspective Thing
Until one’s perspective is fully aligned with facts and reality (the truth), they cannot hope to interact rightly in relationships, even if they have the coveted title of “Leader”.
Once again: when brokenness collides with truth there is always a choice.
One can hunker down and bring on the blame-game in full force, or they can choose to respond rightly.
To respond rightly is to choose to bring forth genuine honesty and to consider the best interests of others before self-preserving interests. Responding rightly also includes stomping on the inner creepy crawlers that drive nasty, self-serving behavior. Either way, this truth remains: the lying mess of behavior associated with false perspective is a train wreck in slow motion. That train wreck is producing the demise and/or death of valued friendships, promising opportunities, and even one’s own coveted reputation!
And here’s the deal, again: the truth about one’s perspective is always revealed through the fruit of behavior.
Fruit does not lie and blame does not cover up
the fruit of one’s behavior!
To stop the train wreck patterns, one’s mental impressions and emotional responses must line up with their understanding of facts and reality – the real truth – not one’s “Self-Truth” of false perspective.
In the scenario with our Dennis the Menace look-alike, he clearly had a vivid interpretation and understanding about the way he believed people could travel to Heaven – or almost to Heaven. However, just beneath the surface of his vivid interpretation and understanding was his even stronger mental impression and emotional response. All of this created his perspective.
In his very public moment of explanation, the fun animation of his childhood interpretation and understanding clearly clashed with the reality of his terrified emotions. In all, his perspective was not properly aligned with truth, but rather it was tainted with some false perspectives. At least he had the child-like innocence to let the “Self-Truth” about his lying perspective be quickly revealed for all to clearly see. When the real truth smacked him right in the eyes, he turned transparently honest!
Amazingly, no one had to say, “My friend, I know you believe that but it simply is not the truth.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
The Dennis the Menace look-alike story is an excerpt from Devaney Rae’s book, Countless Joys: The Place Beyond Tears (Westbow Press, 2015). Available @ amazon.com/author/devaneyrae
Copyright 2016, Devaney Rae, L.L.C. All Rights Reserved.
