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I Am A Great Person

Maybe this has happened to you.

I once worked for a senior Marine officer who made it very obvious that he did not like me – for example, when I would say good morning to him, he would walk on by me without making a reply.  So, one day, I turned and followed him into his office, shut the door, and asked him straight out, “Sir, why don’t you like me?”

He stammered and stuttered and finally was able to say, “What gives you the impression I don’t like you?”

“Well, the fact that for the last three mornings I said good morning to you and you just walked by me without acknowledging my presence was a pretty good indication.  Have I done something to offend you?  Do you feel I am not living up to my potential?  Surely, there has to be a reason for your behavior?”  I just kept staring at him waiting for an answer.

“The truth is, Warrant Officer, I just don’t like you,” he finally admitted.

There it was.  He just didn’t like me.  No logical reason – no perceived slight for which I could apologize – no failure to complete a task properly – he just didn’t like me.  So, what can you do when this happens to you?  My solution was not what he expected.  I looked him in the eye and explained a simple truth to him.

“Sir, you have that right.  But you need to understand one thing.  I am a great person and if you will take the time to get to know me, you will come to the understanding that I am, in fact, a great person.  But, if you take the time to get to know me and you still do not like me, that is fine because one fact will never change and that is that I am a great person.”

With that, I left his office.  And yes, in time he came around because of the most important part of the statement I made – I was committed to doing my absolute best and to perform at my best to live up to the words I had spoken.

In this day of bullying, cyber trolling, backstabbing to get ahead attitudes, and outright mean behavior, knowing who you are and living up to your own set of standards of excellence is your only defense.

So, the next time you are confronted with someone who is treating you badly and you know for sure there is no logical reason other than they just do not like you, remind yourself that you are a great person and then set out to prove it to everyone.  You will be surprised at the difference it makes in your life.

And remember, I can tell you this because “I am a great person.”

Len Bernat
Len Bernat
LEN is a leader groomed by 20 years of molding and shaping by some of the finest leaders in the United States Marine Corps. Their guidance helped Len realize his full potential as he moved from an enlisted Marine to becoming an Officer of Marines. Len became known for being the leader who could turn any lackluster organization into a strong, functional unit. Upon his retirement, Len worked in several positions before finally starting a second career in governmental procurement. His experience and leadership skills enabled him to be recognized as the 2011 Governmental Procurement Officer of the Year for the Governmental Procurement Association of Georgia and opened doors for him to teach at many of the association’s conferences. Len was also called to the ministry and was ordained at Ashford Memorial Methodist Church in November of 1999. Today, Len is the Pastor of Maxeys Christian Church in Maxeys, Georgia. Len has been married to his wife, Hazel, for 36 years and they have three daughters, three grandchildren, and three great-grandchildren. Grab your copy of Len's new Book – Leadership Matters | Advice From A Career USMC Officer. Using his life experiences as examples, Len takes the eleven principles of leadership and the fourteen traits every leader should possess—which he learned during twenty years in the Marine Corps—and teaches the reader how he was molded and shaped by some of the best leaders the Corps had to offer.

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24 CONVERSATIONS

  1. You are a great person Len, because being humble often means they cannot see your confidence. Perhaps that particular officer felt threatened. Perhaps his behavior was based on personal insecurity. Even Marines are human, and you were right to put him in his place. Sometimes we need those instances in life to remind us that not everyone will play nice in the sandbox. For better or worse, the moment served to challenge you. Some would have ignored it, you chose to confront it. Kudos… I’ll bet that same situation or dynamic would never serve to intimidate you again. On his end, I hope that he also learned a valuable lesson… to treat all subordinates with equal dignity and respect. An officer should always remain professional. Perhaps your act squared him away for all future consideration… 🇺🇸

    • Aaron – Much of what you said in your comment was true. I was sent to this supply department because they had failed their annual inspection miserably. I was known for being the guy sent in to fix these supply departments. So, he knew of my reputation and resented my assignment. But I was determined to turn the department around and make him look good whether he liked it or not. Don’t know if he ever changed but I truly hope he did. Thanks for your comments.

  2. I have no doubt that you are a great person and that facing the situation with those who seem to deny it is absolutely right: I did it too in a case that happened to me. Better to say clearly how things stand.
    However, I also think that doing your best means using habits, behaviors, attitudes already present in us. However, if the situation has changed, it is more challenging, if we enter a much more demanding managerial role, it may no longer be enough, on the contrary, we risk doubling our efforts, to always obtain the same results.
    To progress and achieve much higher results, it is necessary to adopt another mental habit, that of doing the “best possible”. That is, adopting new behaviors, attitudes and strategies required in that situation to achieve higher goals. Doing the “best possible” means looking at the best there is in that sector and adopting the most effective habits. In this way we will see how our limits will be overcome by new skills expressed by more effective behaviors.

  3. I enjoyed reading this article that in essence reminded us as readers of the importance of knowing who we are and recognizing our self-worth without arrogance.

    We will always have critics and people will from time to time make us feel ‘less than..’ Confidence will keep us from absorbing their negativity. And faith.

    Thank you, Len.

  4. Thanks Len for this insightful article, and all I will add is that when somone challenges me as not being a good person?, I take for the grain assault who it is that is attacking me, and then I walk away and pray for them, and that is my way of proving exactly that. We cannot pre-judge and yet that is what we do. Have a blessed Thanksgiving.

  5. Len: In my experience few people have the courage to do what you did. They take the easy way out and hide from the truth. Confronting adversity takes courage, self confidence, and a willingness to face the uncomfortable. The same issue that causes a manager to shy away from talking to an unhappy customer, guest, patron, or a less than satisfactory employee.

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