Conversation is a meeting of minds with different memories and habits. When minds meet, they don’t just exchange facts: they transform them, reshape them, draw different implications from them, and engage in new trains of thought. Conversation doesn’t just reshuffle the cards: it creates new cards.
— Theodore Zeldin
The Transformational Power of Real Conversations
In an age of hyper-connectivity, the power and art of conversations is being lost. Conversations are not a rehearsed stage presentation or a simple exchange of information between people —they can be so much more. At times, they can be a process to clarify your thinking, they can present an opportunity to be educated, and they can be a creative spark that changes your whole life. They can give a voice to the voiceless. A conversation is simply a vehicle, not the prize itself, as the real power comes in the form of expression, understanding, and developing a genuine connection with another human being.
It’s Time for “ConverSessions” that Matter
ConverSession; 1. a term coined by 360° Nation to prioritize and amplify conversation over presentation and dialogue over monologue; the act or an instance of engaging with others in an open, honest, and candid manner; an inspiring verbal exchange of ideas sparked by a brief introductory talk centered on personal growth & development; a free-flowing exchange of ideas and opinions catalyzing action; a gathering where people feel seen, valued, and heard in a safe space, and without judgment.
It’s time to pivot from stuffy, over-rehearsed stage monologues to genuine, interactive conversations. TED TALKS have value, but the transformational missing ingredient is dialogue. When we dare to transition from simply being in front of, the audience, to interacting and exploring people and issues at deeper levels, we shift the direction of change forever. And when held inside a safe space of love, you will always come out the other side better.
At the heart of it all, real conversations are human. They embody our humanity by encompassing the sharing of emotions, a willingness to be vulnerable, and a receptiveness to fresh and different ideas. Real conversations invite the sense of “us” into a space where a participatory reality unfolds.
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This is a topic worth commenting on as the back of a good conversation seems to be dwindling. I recently began a three year course in Spiritual Direction. One of the main focal points is Creative Listening. so many times I have been in a group of people talking about an interesting subject, yet, they are all trying to prove a point without listening. I let my own spouse know that when he is on the phone speaking to someone, let them speak, wait, and then answer. Give them time to respond to what you have to say. It’s an art to be a good listener and I am really going to work on that for me. I want to be a good listener.
Good points indeed, Lynn. Listening is a skill that left the arena long ago. I applaud your efforts to bring it back into focus.”Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.” –Karl A. Menniger
We are in danger of losing the ability to communicate empathically with others. On the Net it is so easy to select people to have conversations with that we do not need special social skills. Social networks often bind us to our “comfort zones”, where we are sure not to run into controversies or clashes with those who don’t think like us, as happens more often on the street, in public places or in the workplace.
It is known that virtual communication does not enjoy the support of non-verbal language, for this reason there is often the risk of not understanding the “tone of voice” and of misunderstanding the meaning of the message,
When we are in front of our interlocutors we are more predisposed to compromise. True communication is made of attention, listening and empathy.
Therefore, an invitation to consider the quality of conversations with more awareness, whether they are online or offline, and to consider the risks deriving from the compulsive use of technology is welcome.
In a world where we live immersed in a digital elsewhere, perhaps we should be able to focus more on what we are doing and on the people in front of us, without leaving room for unnecessary interruptions. We should be there at all times, whatever we do. Only in this way can we be sure of making the best use of the time and energy at our disposal.
You captured the essence of it all right here, Aldo: “When we are in front of our interlocutors we are more predisposed to compromise. True communication is made of attention, listening and empathy.” … Thank you for adding your keen insights!
Having a conversation is a powerful way to impact people. That’s when you get the opportunity to communicate, understand, and empathize with people. You words could be the thing that strengthen the person and change his/her perspective on issues of life. Having a conversation has made me understand peoples values, know what we share in common, and also our differences.
Right on target in every respect here, Precious – thanks for adding such wisdom to this discussion!
No offense taken at the percussive remark, Peter. I love the beat, especially that of the heart that feels heard and harmonized through the interactive engagement. There are discussion, datcussion and deuddercussions that make the world go round. The beauty is in the commonality that becomes present in the depth of the conversessions. In real life and challenges, conversations can solve anything, imho.
Dialogue beats discussion, which comes from the root of percussion (to beat around) – apologies to any drummers here !! 🙂
Well said, my friend – Right on target!
A conversation is simply a vehicle, not the prize itself, as the real power comes in the form of expression, understanding, and developing a genuine connection with another human being by Dennis Pitocco
True what you wrote, Dennis. I have exchanged over the years thousands of comment with great minds. These conversations not only reshaped my thinking, upgraded it but also transformed it.
Your excellent post suggests a new meter for conversations by the effect they have on our thinking. Transformation of minds is the highest effect real conversations have.
Your words ring true, my friend. A great conversation coupled with intentional listening is simply priceless. Thank you!