I shot up from a sound sleep to the phone ringing.
What time is it?
#
2 am! Emergency. What’s wrong?
The insurance way someone would be calling me would be because of an emergency.
I answered.
Eyes still half-closed.
Hello?
Shouting. I could barely make out the words.
You will never leave me. I’m not going anywhere. This is not over. I will find you!
I was wide awake now.
Oh no, I’m not doing this.
Who are you seeing? I will get him too.
Now you should know I am against cheating at all costs.
Which he knew. He was pushing my buttons.
This isn’t over. I love you.
What? Are you crazy?
This is exactly why this is over. I am NOT doing this anymore!
We clearly can’t communicate from here on out.
I’m done!
I hung up the phone and blocked the number.
This went on for months. He kept getting new numbers to call me from.
Every time my phone rang.
Heart Racing, panic, sweating. I was always looking over my should.
Every time I would block the number a new one would pop up.
Over 30 phone numbers I blocked. 20 to 50 calls a day for a year.
He wouldn’t give up. He was relentless.
How did I ever marry this man?
He wasn’t like that when I met him. He didn’t reveal himself until later.
The day the divorce was final. I changed my number and got the first Goodnight sleep in a year. Peace!
I had a lot of sleepless nights.
A lot of trauma I had to break through.
I did it. It was possible. It is possible.
My advice to you his this. This is not a healthy relationship.
If this sounds familiar to you please know you do not deserve to be treated this way by anyone.
It may be hard.
They may charm their way back in.
They have you on a tight leash and you don’t even know it because it happens so fast.
Little by little the leash got tighter and tighter.
I did a lot of digging deep on myself to overcome this.
Those layers don’t melt away quickly.
I discovered my part. I discovered what I was allowing.
I am grateful for the lessons now because they lead me to this point.
To help other people break free.
I am free. I know my worth. I value myself. I am enough and so are you!
Great article. I am so proud of you for standing up for yourself. I too was in a marriage that was abusive and I finally said enough and got out. It’s not easy but you can do it and you do deserve better. I know at the time I didn’t think so my self esteem was so low and I felt trapped. I am a survivor now and my life began after this 28 yr old marriage. Thanks for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for sharing your story too. Being in that low, dark lace is suffocating. It seems Iike this is the cards we have been dealt. Once you remember who you are, you realize you have the power to choose the life you want.
Oh my good friend, You most certainly Are More Than Enough. You are an amazing, bright, brilliant woman who has stood up and owned your value — then went on to support others by saying your truth. Thank you Claudia.
Thank you Mariah! You are an inspiration to me. I appreciate your support!
Claudia, thank you so much for this personal and heart wrenching share.
The courage, strength and tenacity to stay grounded in your truth is a story that needs to be shared.
It is truly much easier to stay than break free.
BLESS you on this next amazing chapter of your beautiful life. #youareenough!
Thank you Carolyn for your kindness. It is never easy to face the your fears head on. It is totally worth it. The strength you discover within yourself is where you realize your worth. Appreciate you contributing here.
Bless you for the strength and courage to set yourself free. I spent many sleepless nights and soaked my pillow with tears, but could breath a lot easier as the years passed once I made the break. Love is wanting the best for the person one is supposed to love, and not meant to destroy.
Thank you for sharing your story Lynn. Those sleepless nights leave your mind spinning. Those tears fall fell heavy from my eyes for years. Once I made the decision that enough is enough, I found myself again. For that I am in the best place of my life. I wish you much happiness in your life. You are supported amd you are worth it.
You are correct Alan. Love is not ownership. It’s not being in control of another person. It’s honor, support, respect. It’s learning and growing together to lift each other up. Appreciate you adding value here.
Congratulations on your liberation, Claudia!
Love is not ownership -it is not pposession – I hope your former husband can learn that as you have, but for you –
glad, so glad you got out!
Alan