I sometimes wonder what many think when they hear the term generational? We are familiar with the phrase “Generational Curse”, where one generation’s problems, challenges, and threats happen to the next through family lines.
A thought, though, if we are familiar with this concept, that ‘things’ are transferred from one generation to the next, why is it many struggles with the idea of generational healing?
We can stop the ‘curse’ from travelling to the next generation when we address the fears, thoughts, and patterns we learnt from our parents and extended family and our story of how we are to show up in the world, and what the world thinks of us.
Powerful stuff this!!
Image the social, mental, emotional, physical, and economic benefits if more people chose to step up and stop the generational traumas, misunderstandings, fear-mongering, and limiting of the potential of the next generation, our children!!
It comes at a cost, though, and one must be willing to pay!
Pay the fee by :
- letting go of inherent, pre-conceived rules, judgements, biases, expectations,
- unlearning the way one thinks, feels and chooses in situations that are no longer congruent with who they choose to be, their values and the character they design for themselves.
- moving away from situations, people, relationships, experiences and scripts reflecting the pre-change way of thinking.
- practising, be prepared to struggle at times, and regularly move through the review and growth process.
- by dreaming, and growing into the person who can hold the dream in reality. Fear doesn’t court with freedom.
- practising being honest with oneself so one can be honest with others.
I get it. For many, the price may feel too high and too protracted to be practised. The fear of the unknown is another common barrier.
We often get in the way of our greatness because we don’t believe we can have good, more, or even better. We are stuck in the bed we made, and willing to surrender to what life is dishing out for us.
But, what if there are easy ways of making the shifts, changes, healing, and growth. Where even baby steps of questioning “Could I have this too?” is the beginning of something new, great, and what your heart and soul desire for you to experience. Could this be enough hope to spark a change, and open the door of possibility that little bit more, letting in a bit more fuel the fire burning in your soul to be-come who you are honestly destined to be before life got hold of you and caged you in.
I will challenge you… Be the person to break the forward generational curse in your family.
Own your inherited stories, pull them apart and see how much truth you choose to hold to them. Are they really a reflection of what happened, or a big mix of interpretations that don’t account for the impact of their parents, the era they grew up in, and the fact they didn’t have access to healthier messaging?
Be compassionately curious about your family’s expectations, rules, and judgements – basically their beliefs about themselves, their life, and what they were good enough. Most have either obvious or subtle social class rules that have been passed on from one generation to another. How about gender rules, or what is socially acceptable, and practical?
How about what is needed to fit in, survive and limit physical, emotional, and mental harm from others?
Consider, like really consider who you desire to be, show up in the world, interact with others, and the types of experiences you dream of. Gently start, give yourself permission to consider, test and then commit to internalising these new beliefs, rules, hopes, and dreams.
There is hope!! Look around you; how many people in your circle, colleagues, or you have witnessed their rag-to-riches stories evolve over time. Learning about their evolution, I suggest it follows the same process. They may have used the same or similar change/healing tools and strategies. Learn about them, and consider that you could make a difference even if it is only a few degrees different from now. Regular shifts make a massive difference over time.
Be you! Stand for what is important to you, your future, the generation entrusted you to lead.