Growing up as a postwar baby boomer we spent little time with our fathers. In my case my 5 brothers and 3 sisters, we saw very little of my father as he worked as a full-time Custom Officer at the US/Canadian border and serving part-time in the Canadian Military Reserve.
Haircuts and many other father and son moments were often outsourced to sports coaches, older brothers or local barbers.
The COVID-19 crisis and shelter in place direction has lent itself for fathers and sons to get acquainted with each other. And to share moments of intimacy like haircuts. One of the sweetest moments I witnessed via a photo sent to me was my son-in-law giving my grandson a haircut. Tender moments like these will no doubt be remembered long after the end of the pandemic by fathers and sons.
I asked many people the following 3 questions when the crisis is over.
What will you start doing?
What will you stop doing?
What will you keep doing?
It is my hope that fathers will keep sharing intimate moments with their sons like haircuts.
What to start, stop and keep doing is the crux of how to thrive.
I appreciate your reminder.
Aha! And: fathers and daughters too. My dad cut my hair when I was a child.
Thanks for the good memories.
What will you start doing? > Reading and commenting on your pieces here. Welcome!
What will you stop doing? > Going to the barber to cut my hair.
What will you keep doing? > Having my wife cut my hair as she has been doing for a month now.
That is what my family would say that’s too funny and truth at the same time. Thanks for belly laugh and truth sharing with me your 3 answers.
Welcome and thanks for the shared article.
We are locked in the house and the only resource we have is the family, it is there that we cling, where we find a relational space that allows us to have the beauty of the bonds, a little fun, the pleasure of being together. Today we make a difference between before, where in the family we tried to do these things but in a hurry, in a compressed time. Before it was as if the dimension of the duty to make a family prevailed over the pleasure of being one. Right now we are realizing that pleasure is also part of duty.
Before it was as if the dimension of the duty to make a family prevailed over the pleasure of being one. Right now we are realizing that pleasure is also part of the duty.
If you have not already written on the idea that pleasure is also a part of duty. I would love you hear more about this.
Chris I love this. Thank you for sharing. Welcome to an inspiring group of storytellers.
Welcome, Chris! What a sweet story and a very interesting question. I would to hear what the dads here have to say. Love the pic, too. I’m thinking about trying to cut my husband’s hair, although that may be a very bad idea. There’s always a ponytail!
Not to worry about cutting his hair, the difference between a good haircut and bad haircut is 2 weeks. And if you really mess up#1 settings on clippers takes it down almost to the wood and erase all mistakes.
Welcome, Chris! When the virus is over I will start walking back down to the bay with my wife while watching the birds and playing with the different dogs I meet along the way. I will look forward to finding a new Shul where I can go to daven (pray) and attend different shiurs. I will keep working well past 1:00 am to grow my business. I will stop ordering from Uber Eats and instead eat at so many of the great Kosher restaurants in the Boro Park section of Brooklyn.
What will keep me going is my Faith and Trust in God. What I will stop doing is getting anxious over silly things. What I will start doing is putting things into priority that I have been putting off., Thanks Chris.
Chris, this is such a wonderful message. I’m borrowing your three questions… they apply to all of us – personally and professionally. Thank you for sharing!
Chris, I love this story, it sure is a memory trigger for me! I have three sons and as they were growing up I was not only cutting their hair at home but their father’s! I hadn’t thought of it for years. Thank you for sharing. And COVID 19 prompted my youngest to ask me for a trim a few days ago. You are right it is an intimate moment surrounded in love & laughter. Thank you!
I think we’re on the same page, maybe different paragraphs if I can beat this metaphor into submission.
I’m not planning for my actions or attitudes after this quake has died down to aftershocks. I think I’m focused on preparation – your piece helped me clarify this. “There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.” So I’m working on subtractive rather than additive energy, letting go, as best as I can, of the fear, resentment, and such to make room for whatever I will need as the next things show up. We know that it won’t be the same, but I don’t know what will be, and that’s okay.
Be good. And well.
Chris – Welcome to the BC360 family where respectful engagement is the norm – encouragement comes from your fellow authors – and new online friends become a treasure in your life. Your introduce with this short but powerful essay is wonderful.
Len, I am grateful to receive your acknowledge as a storyteller. Thank-you for your….
Google definition of encouragement
help or stimulate (an activity, state, or view) to develop.
“the intention is to encourage new writing talent”
Chris – I like that – thanks.