To help you achieve your goal, it helps to have a fellow dreamer, a peer or mentor to work with you. This peer-mentor can be a friend, a co-worker, another close associate, or a complete stranger, better not with a spouse or best friend.
Your peer-mentor need not be a professional (such as a clergyman, social worker, or human resources counselor), but should be a person who has resources or skills which you do not, and who has agreed to support you by sharing their knowledge and skills with you. This is the person with whom you will review your objectives each week, making sure your goals are specific and checking to see if you are sticking to your set goals , eliminating anything which wastes time or energy. In turn, you agree to offer him/ her the support, resources and skills he/she needs.
I have sometimes called this process “Goal Tenders”, because the idea is to give each other “tender, loving support” as you strive after your goals. Unlike in basketball, where goaltending refers to an illegal defensive move, here Goal Tenders refers to something mutually beneficial:
“You help me tend to my goal, and I’ll help you tend to yours.” You each identify your goal and you each agree to help the other in achieving it. This process is also called “re-source-ing” – a method for you to use the resources of another person, in order to help you achieve your goals.
In our workshops, we help each person identify a goal, and then we assist them to pair up with another person who has complementary needs and skills to their own. The two proceed to form a “Peer Mentor” contract, in which they formalize their mutual support.
The details of the contract can be as simple or complicated as you like; the important thing is – it’s an agreement between two people to help and support each other as they move along toward achieving their goals.
In “A Swift Kick in the Can’ts – the New Peer Mentor Model for Success Now” Mentor-Success, I show a sample contract and how to fill it out.