From childhood and beyond, some aspects of life influenced by upbringing and acquired attitudes may not have materialized into a positive view of the world. A basic element is being brought up in a positive, anything-is possible-attitude can pay dividends. And if you don’t try it, forever ‘haunted’ by the ‘what-if’ scenario.
Making a wrong decision and later realizing the decision was clearly connected with a future opportunity and would not have reached fruition had the initial decision not been made, a Coincidence?
Although the future is unknown, looking back on events can expose intriguing links as if pre-ordained.
One experience may lead to another; perhaps months or more afterward. The future is hidden; unknown. But is it pre-defined?
Predictions are one thing, but quite out of context, and without the initial event being identified as the facilitator, wonderfully positive situations can materialize. Naturally, the opposite can be the case; a positive situation following a decision can lead to a negative scenario after a number of months or years have passed. There is no set time limit from one to another, as time moves on the ‘connected’ memory may well be lost.
A link with for example a wrong decision that caused much disruption in personal and business life. In other words, had that wrong decision ultimately been a factor in a future, enjoyable, life-changing opportunity? Coincidence or ‘mapped out’?
POSITIVE OUTCOME
Orientated around a business-related environment, this essay is essentially focused on negative experiences morphing into positive outcomes. Making a wrong decision; not planned, of course, but being ultimately ‘repaid’ by a worthy opportunity. Orientated around a business-related environment.
For example, a job application or having actually won the position. A decision process reached by strict analysis of pros and cons, compatibility, and a feeling of motivation and even excitement. This is the non-emotional formula: Qualified for the job, high salary package, a move to another area or country, meeting with future colleagues.
Add the human elements; family, extended family, relatives, friends, and a slight hesitancy visits the individual but over-ridden by ambition. There would be an awareness of potential obstacles but brushed aside; not necessarily in a selfish or overly ambitious way. Ultimately, in this case, the heart; initial instincts do not lead or win but are pushed aside. Potentially negative vibes pushed aside.
However, how do we arrive at a decision; a career move for example? What is the motivator? Is it purely for financial gain, a change of direction, something new; challenging?
Being confident and convinced that such a decision would pay not only financial dividends but a move up the ladder of career advancement and financial gain is an extremely strong motivator. Some decisions will be clinical, based on a serious analysis of potential employment. Others more sensitive and open to another level of subliminal influence; the heart, gut-feeling, sixth sense.
FOLLOWING THE HEART – INSTINCT – GUT FEELING
How many times have you experienced a reticence; just a feeling that it may not be a good idea, but discounted any doubts and proceeding regardless; overriding sixth-sense and the heart.
Following the heart; instinct, sixth-sense or ‘gut-feeling’ seems as though a number of factors are gathered, filtered, analysed, ‘arriving’ in the heart, which if ‘listened to’ will create a feeling of comfort……or discomfort because a quiet voice is warning of potential conflict or having made a wrong decision.
More often than not, ignoring the heart could be a mistake. However everyone is unique; different, so what visits one person may not visit another.
There are more elements at play than just reading a corporate profile and job specification and meeting hiring managers and team members
There is nothing wrong with following the ‘technicalities’ – non-emotional, ‘facts-driven’ decision. But any hint of ‘sixth-sense’ or a heart-led, subliminal (or indeed overt concern) requires careful thought. This is not a panacea but something to consider. Challenging when hell-bent on a career move. But what about family for example?
Only after objective analysis could two events be seen as connected. For example, a future experience would not have taken place without the initial ‘event’ happening and clearly connected to the future situation.
Being in the right place at the right time.
‘What-if I had done this or that?’ Or wonder why something unpleasant happened, yet looking back, it seemed to be part of a ‘master plan’ as it opened up an opportunity or situation previously unknown. The future is under wraps, but as it moves away, the result is clear to see.
To some it would be viewed as ‘Divine Intervention’, others would discount any form of divinity being involved. For how many billions of people could an entity possibly ‘manage’ myriad events.
‘There is no such thing as coincidence’ is a phrase more often used to describe one event leading to another, in someway, sometimes but unconnected. We could suffer trauma, being out of a job, or lost a loved one. At the time, any form of optimism would be clouded in anger, anxiety, and extreme grief. There is only grief when a loved one is lost.
Over a lifetime there will be many such experiences where it seems an initial event was ‘designed’ in order that an ultimate positive happening or opportunity or new relationship materializes. Naturally, this can be in the reverse, but let us maintain positivity.
Think back to a situation where such an experience; be it positive or negative, not have occurred, would be where we are now? It is the connection; link to a previous decision (e.g. An ultimately bad one) that is turned around to open a new opportunity, new life, and happiness. Had the ‘bad experience not been visited, the future opportunity would not have been realized. Here is the critical link. Is this coincidence or some form of ‘intervention’?
Think for a moment how many times where a decision has been made and clearly linked to a future situation. As if an entity was at the helm, providing lessons of life’s downs and ups.
Pre-ordained, Divine Intervention, heart-led, or simply coincidence. Regardless of faith, there will be aspects of the ‘coincidence’ factor which may well be feasible.
Just think back to similar situations. Chances are there will be connectivity. By chance? Coincidence? Or some form of a positive element that reaches the heart and somehow serves as a pause to take thought?
The essay is based not on science, but on personal experiences and those of others.
Having enjoyed the book Range by David Epstein, the term “match” comes up. Is this or that career a good match for who you are? (It is different from “fit” because this term seems to have appropriated to describe if a person fits into the local organizational culture.)
Let us assume that there is a set of good matches, but they may not be evident at the time we start our professional lives. If we start with something that is not a good match, that will probably activate the wrong heartstrings – the sixth sense.
Over time we may get to know our own strengths and weaknesses, values, and priorities better, and gradually we search more purposefully for a good match.
Is that preordained? Or is it as natural as water running where there is the least resistance?
All that said, how often does it happen that you learned something important from the s### you went through that proved very useful later?
Dear Charlotte,
Your comments are analytical and indeed revealing. There is no fixed element as what looks like something that has been ‘preordained’ to one person would be viewed as a simple coincidence. Had we not experienced a particular trauma earlier in life, we may not have achieved what we have, or entered a new relationship culminating in for example, marriage a children.
There is certainly ‘something out there’ that seems to have some form of influence, but it depends if an individual accepts, or tuned in, or discounts such feelings as irrelevant. So yes, the s*** we may have experienced may have been a pathway to greater things. Thank you so much for your enlightening comments, Charlotte.
Seeing patterns requires inner wisdom!
There’s a lot of rough stuff that provides the experience that leads to wisdom.
In bits and pieces. Many times painful. Difficult to find the positives, at time.
And yet on the healing end of that – – growth happens and that’s one of life’s positives.
blessings,
Cynthia