When you’re standing, book in hand, trying to decide whether this book or that book should make its way to your personal library, do you first crack it open and read bits and pieces? I do that. Only then do I decide yes because it’s relevant and readable or no because it would become another shelf ornament. Coach the Person Not the Problem: A Guide to Using Reflective Inquiry by Marcia Reynolds is a firm yes.
She had me at: When coaches use reflective statements, people hear their words, see how their beliefs form their perceptions and face the emotions they are expressing. Then, when 
coaches follow up with a confirming question or exploratory question clients are prompted to stop and examine their thinking. We use reflective statements plus questions to trigger people to reflect on how they think.
The mind is a powerful tool. Someone once said, “If you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right. This book teaches coaches how to harvest the best in people. Reynolds said, “If you are following a formula or model, you aren’t really coaching.” Every individual is a unique mix of talent, experience, and background. Because of this, coaching can’t be effective when the basis is standardized questions and formulas.
What you learn in this book will change the trajectory of your coaching practice. What I described above is barely scratching the surface of a deeply powerful guide for coaches to partner with clients and lead them through the process of self-discovery and potential.
The book is built around five essential practices and three mental habits. Here’s the thing. These practices and habits are valuable in building relationships, improving the quality of life, developing a new skill, or enhancing hidden talent. My personal favorites are the essential practices of active replay and goaltending. If you buy the book there are three other practices. As a person who recognizes the signs of aging, the chapter on the habit of aligning your brain is especially helpful. What you learn from this book has so many factors that are relevant and central to simply being human. It’s going to help you, even if you aren’t coaching anyone other than yourself or someone who wants to experience progress in their development.
