Change….. Why Is It So Difficult?

“Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end”

~Robin Sharma

As I observe not just the state of the world and the intense reactions to current events demonstrated by people who are not happy; but also, the individual at the micro level, I see a foundation of fear of change.

Change is occurring all the time, every day, every year. The unknown of tomorrow and the future makes it uncomfortable for most. But, when you are at a higher emotional intelligence, the process of change is a welcome event with embracing change as opportunity.

One of the keys for allowing change to happen, no matter how resistant you may feel or the conflict it may cause, is not judging the experience or the people involved. Pause…..

The power of the pause is an excellent tool used to avoid reaction. When pausing you will have an experience unfolding from a positive point of view with the anabolic energy of awareness, personal expression, and managing your own emotions.

Change is difficult because there is a definitive process with five stages that takes place for you to move from what you perceive as true and what you have accepted to new truths requiring you to replace old beliefs, perceptions, and understandings.

Stage One

You are aware of changes you desire but have no intention or interest in shifting your current behavior or thinking. At this stage, there are external influences causing you to resist the change or you feel pressured by the idea of change. To move through this stage, it is essential to instill motivation from within and look towards positive outcomes.

Stage Two

You will acknowledge there is a reason for change and face the uncertainty with a commitment to receiving the benefits of change. You will be inclined to review the advantages and disadvantages of continuing with your current beliefs, thoughts, and behaviors; and then moving forward with change gaining momentum.

Example: Belief, thought, behavior – victim mindset, the fear of loss of something

Disadvantages of continuing the current thought and behavior – I will stay stressed and dissatisfied

Advantages of continuing the current thought and behavior – I will stay in my comfort zone

Disadvantages of changing the current thought and behavior – I may have difficulty adjusting to the change

Advantages of changing the current thought and behavior – I will have better experiences

Stage 3

Commitment at this stage allows you to begin the preparation for change. You have established the advantages for change, looking at how these will override any disadvantage you perceive. Exploring the potential outcomes, planning how to move forward, and setting goals reinforces your commitment. Accountability to following through insures success in mastering the change.

Stage 4

You have put your plans into action with the desire to reach a specific goal. Adjustments to furthering the change desired helps to stick with the commitment made. An increase in support, encouragement from others, and positive experiences gives insight into the success of the changes happening.

Past beliefs, thoughts, and behaviors are now being transformed.

Stage 5

Maintaining the new desired beliefs and behavior leads to an awareness of possibility and potentiality for creating change. It does not seem so insurmountable and hard to achieve. Once you have taken yourself through these five stages any future change can be achieved faster and with better results.

This is a good time for self-reflection, recognizing pattern shifts and becoming more proactive in embracing change for success.

Change is a process, one that can be beneficial for you and those in your life experiences.


Eileen Bild
Eileen Bild
EILEEN is Founder of The Core Thinking Blueprint Method, CEO of Ordinary to Extraordinary Life, Executive Producer of OTELproductions, and talk show host for OTEL TALK. She holds a Masters in Transpersonal Psychology and is a published author, Internationally Syndicated Columnist, contributing author to the inspiring book Chaos to Clarity: Sacred Stories of Transformational Change and Breakthrough S.P.A.R.K. Coach. Eileen and her husband Trevor are a power couple whose foundation is a 360 view of the world through inspiring, uplifting, and empowering others. Maximizing performance, communication, and drive for growth for your highest achievement is what you will experience working with Eileen and Trevor. They are owners and producers for ROKU channels KNOB TV, OTEL TALK, and OTEL MUSIC VIDEOS; and develop channels for professionals and businesses. They collaborate with companies, such as 360° Nation/Dennis Pitocco, musicians, entrepreneurs, and many more. Go from Ordinary to Extraordinary!

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  1. Many have difficulty getting their arms around what it means to accomplish strategic change. I use exercise programs as examples of the life stages for change. I give running program examples. I give body building program examples. I give power lifting program examples.

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