Can We Please All Just Stop Judging Each Other?

For the past two weeks, my left arm has been in a brace and wrapped so I could not bend it or use it for much of anything.  Because I am not rich or lucky, I still had to go to work every day.  Driving was really interesting.  Some of you on the same roads as I was, may have wished that I was rich or lucky!  Please keep wishing. This may be obvious, but driving with one arm has some limitations.  I could not really hold on as I recommend in my book (10-2!).  I pretty much had to drive with one arm everywhere I went.  It was difficult and I found myself being more careful than I usually am.

One of the things I had to give up during the last two weeks, was using my blinker.  I am a pretty religious blinker user.  I am the guy who will talk out loud to the cars in front of me and say things like “What is your blinker broken?”  I am also the one who, when someone forgets to turn their blinker off will say things like “What!  Are you going slowly around the world to the right?”[su_spacer]
Well, after a couple of days driving with one arm one of my coworkers commented on how hard it must be to drive with just one arm.  I heard myself respond with “Yeah!  Now I am the jerk who doesn’t use his blinker.”  We laughed about it. Yet, as I thought about it more, I realized how easy it is to judge each other based only on what we can see.  My arm was in a sling and brace below the window view.  Likely no other driver could see that I had my arm tied up and not free for use.  They would not have known I could literally not use my blinker.  How many of them may have called out a critique of me?[su_spacer]
Every day we are hit with new blurbs, pop-ups, and stories that judge someone based on what we can see.  Let’s face it, we all do it.  It is so easy to do.
Then, I realized that we live in a world where people do this all the time.  We look at what we can see and draw conclusions.  We take our limited view and are sure we can make an accurate assessment of what is really going on.  We speak these things as if they are “gospel truth.”  Every day we are hit with new blurbs, pop-ups, and stories that judge someone based on what we can see.  Let’s face it, we all do it.  It is so easy to do. I am not suggesting any of us can be perfect in this, but we could all make a concentrated effort to not make snap judgments about others.  We could slow down, or even hit the brakes and really look at what might really be going on in someone’s life.  We could try to see more.  We could postpone any judgment until we have a clearer view.  Heck, we could just try not to judge at all.[su_spacer]
I personally believe that people are doing the best that they can with what they know and have at the time.  I know I am.  If that is true, then maybe I could let them off the hook.  Maybe I can try to give the benefit of the doubt.  Maybe I can suspend all judgment and just be loving and understanding.  I guess it is possible that I may get burned a time or two.  Yet, it seems like such a better way to live.[su_spacer]
I am going through a hard trial right now.  I learned from a dear and wise friend that people had been talking about me and my situation.  When she overheard their comments, she responded, “You know, I don’t care about all of that.  He is my friend and I love him.”  She didn’t jump into the judging and gossiping.  She was just supportive.  I hope people don’t make negative assessments about me because I know very few people can or have seen what is really going on.[su_spacer]
So, as we head down the roads of life this week, let’s try to be less quick to draw conclusions about others and what they are doing.  Let’s give people our most generous assumption about their behavior.  This may not change the entire world, but it will surely change us.  I am resolved to be less judgmental going forward.  Can we please all seek to do the same?


Jim R. Jacobs
Jim R. Jacobs
Jim R Jacobs is a brave creator who strives to do mighty things! Jim is a Certified Daring Way Facilitator helping others to live more brave and authentic lives! He is the author of Driving Lessons For Life: Thoughts on Navigating Your Road to Personal Growth. Jim speaks professionally, and coaches others to success and living with integrity. He is a counselor, educator, innovator, father, and friend. Please check out Jim R. Jacobs and Driving Lessons For Life and find Jim on social media! Let's connect and dare mighty things!

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  1. This is written with so much empathy and heartfelt appeal. Unfortunately we tend to make snap judgements, without the facts, which may only be half-truths or no truths at all. I feel that it’s so much easier to acknowledge the truth in all of that when we’re on the other side. When we’re being judged falsely or have been judged. We know the pain and can be more empathetic. But do we really need to go down that path at all? Let’s just stop judging each other!

    I enjoyed reading, Jim. Thank you.

    • Thank you for your kind time in reading and responding! You have well spoken the challenge even more here! Thank you!