Do you have paradigms that run your life? Old, worn-out ones that society has branded you with, not being good enough, being stupid, being careless, etc? Do you want to sweep out your negative mind chatter, and replace it with the message I Am More Than Enough?
For many years, I internalized all the negativity passed down to me. I knew it was the truth. However, that was their truth and my buying into their nonsense, their false perceptions, made it mine. I continued berating myself for years. Now I look back and realize this behavior isn’t just corrosive and untrue, it’s also unattractive. People don’t gravitate to someone with a low self-esteem. By continually acting out these traits, I unintentionally pushed people away.
Focus on what you can do. Let go of those who weigh you down, those who don’t support all that you can be.
Everyone reading this has value. Everyone reading this is More Than Enough. You are a worthy person. Be proud of the things you’ve done, know that you have more amazing things yet to do. List huge goals that will make you stretch and grow. Plan them out. Review them daily.
As your attitude toward yourself improves, so will your relationship with others. We want to be around people with high energy and a positive, happy attitude. You can be that person. Not everything you think about yourself is true. We can take our past mistakes, and review them closely and honestly. There are things we’ve all done that we’d love a “do-over,” for, but our past is unchangeable. That said, we don’t have to continue dragging it along with us into the future. The most productive thing to do is learn from those mistakes, forgive yourself, harvest the good lessons, and leave the past behind where it belongs. As Louise Hay wrote, “Would you really dig into yesterday’s garbage to make tonight’s meal?”
There’s only one person who gets to occupy your brain space, and that person is you. You’re the only one who gets to hear your Inner Voice. Is your Inner Voice a friend or a foe?
Stop the inner critic before it starts. Become aware of the negative messages you allow to enter your mind. When they start, question them. Awareness is the first step of cleaning up, and pushing out the negative dialogue.
When we internalize a positive mindset, the noisy demands of society fade into the background. If you’re having difficulty believing you have value, try a method I call Mirror Work. It’s easy to add this to your daily routine. When brushing your teeth, for example, look at the mirror and say I love you, followed by your name. Then provide an affirmation, I AM ________. Remember, whatever follows I AM, follows you. Adding a solid, truthful reason for your ‘I am’ will create a new paradigm, and a new life for you to embrace.
If you suffer with low self-esteem, and don’t believe you have any value, use simple facts initially. Say I AM a man or I AM a woman, I AM a daughter/son, father/mother, an employee, a neighbor. You understand the concept. Once you’re able to master I AM _____, move forward, saying I Am More Than Enough, I Am Worthy, I Am a Good Person. Mirror work will promote your self-respect, and a positive mindset.
Mirror work and its affirmations cause a solid mindset shift when accompanied by gratitude journaling. Gratitude journaling is another easy exercise that will build your self-compassion and self-confidence. Start small, perhaps writing 3 things a day in a journal. Write about something you’re grateful for, clean water, food, reliable transportation, clothes, education, simple things you take for granted, yet not everyone has.
These days I need a telescope to see the tactless, judgmental, unhappy version of Mariah from years gone by. The ‘me’ you know is an awesome human, with character traits that others want to be around. I shower others with kindness, compassion, gratitude, and respect, and I get it back in return. My life is joyful, full, and rich in all ways. If you begin to incorporate these simple steps into a daily routine, a year from now you, too, will need a telescope to see the old you. Once you understand that you have the key in your hands to make this change, you can begin your journey into the new, magnificent you.
Lean in, learn, grow forward, and Journey Well.
Happiness is something subjective and personal. For some, living a happy life could mean traveling the world and indulging in a thousand adventures, while for others it can be always staying in the same place reassured by a quiet routine.
Happiness has a thousand meanings, what matters is being able to understand what it represents for each of us and build it day after day.
I have always thought of happiness as a recipe to be created following their own rules, in which everyone must choose their own ingredients and it is for this reason that I do not think there are effective instructions to follow to the letter but only stimuli and ideas that can allow you to form your own. personal vision of happiness and lead to reflect on what you need.
According to my idea of happiness, to live a full and happy life you need to learn to take care of yourself, not neglect your desires, focus on your goals and manage your time well to make room for the things you love.
But in particular I think we need to start with EXPRESS GRATITUDE.
Gratitude is truly the key to living a happy and fulfilling life. Reflecting on what we have and being grateful for it immediately makes us feel lucky and takes away that sense of frustration we feel when we focus on the things that are missing or not going the way we would like.
We all have reasons to thank and by learning not to take them for granted, we begin to think more positively. Day after day by striving to shift our attention to the good things that happen automatically to us, we will no longer have room for the negative thoughts that make us unhappy.
I appreciate your thoughtful insights Aldo.