Most of us learned that we need to delay our gratification. Vegetables before dessert. Homework before play.Do what they say and we’ll get what we want. Our parents negotiated with us in endless ways around the belief that we have to ‘pay’ for our pleasure.
Many of us learned that some form of payment is due (hard work, sacrifice, or integrity) to receive pleasure. Pleasure in the forms of money, health, recognition, love, sex, joy or success. Our expectations of having to earn our pleasure tell the quantum field to respond with experiences that match those expectations. Many of us have learned that the price we pay will always be much higher than the pleasure we receive. These beliefs limit the pleasure that is available to us all the time. Are those beliefs even true?
What about the idea of receiving? Do we have to earn that too? Most of us were taught that if we give to someone, they will give back to us when the tables are turned allowing us to receive and keep the relationship in balance. Yet so many of us find ourselves disappointed when this doesn’t happen the way we expect it to. We often think that we are supposed to receive from those whom we give to and this keeps us stuck in the same hope-disappointment loop with them when we don’t get what we want or expect. If someone gives to us unexpectedly with a compliment, connection, or support we may struggle to simply receive the gift. Instead, we may push it away or create an obligation in our mind that must be paid back to keep things even in the relationship. This keeps us out of the experience of pleasure and gratitude that is available when we allow ourselves to simply receive.
What if we expanded our view of giving and receiving? Instead of seeking to give and receive from the same person, we can give when we feel inspired without an expectation of getting anything back.
Then, when someone wants to give to us, it’s easy to receive their gift knowing that our energy of giving is coming back to us in the form of a different person or experience.
Some people have decided to eat their dessert first! What’s different about them? They believe that their pleasure comes first. They are committed to giving to themselves and feeling good.
What if we aimed at feeling good (receiving pleasure) with each of our moment-to-moment choices? The quantum field will respond with more experiences of pleasure every time!
What can you do to feel pleasure today?