Being “Self Centered” vs “Service Centered”

My mom lives in a gated community in Istanbul. When I came down to visit her, I noticed the security guys working there are very fond of her. I asked why they treated her differently. She said that whenever she bakes anything, as soon as it is out of the oven, she brings some of it to these hardworking and under-compensated people we take for granted.

So, whenever she comes home with stuff she needs to carry in the building, they run to help her not because they have to but because they want to.

Because it is that easy to make people happy…

It is that easy to make them feel seen and appreciated. It does not require a lot to make one’s day.

When we live a life that has a service-centered perspective rather than a self-centered one, our lives get filled with joy and abundance. When we live to serve and give without expecting anything back, rather than looking for reciprocation of what we gave out, we raise our happiness, as well as the happiness of others.

Service = Joy + Wealth + Abundance

A full-face smile, a genuine hello, a random act of kindness, a funny – bellylaugh kind of joke, a heartfelt compliment, a fearless and generous expression of unconditional love, and a limitless curiosity on how to be of help to others are not only, and mostly, free of charge, but also they all raise the collective energy.

These acts raise your energy instantly as the giver, of the immediate receiver(s), and of the collective and turn into pure joy for all. That is why when they asked Mother Teresa how she found the inner strength to live such a life of self-sacrifice, she said,

If people knew how much joy I was experiencing, they wouldn’t consider this to be a sacrifice.

I invite you to be intentional in being that kind and giving person for a little while instead of choosing to be a self-centered one. I say only, “for a little while,” because when you taste the “helper’s high” – that Dr. Allen Luks describes as the rush of endorphins into the brain that people get when they help other people – you will not be able to quit being that service-centered human.

I guarantee that you will love it!


Ipek Williamson
Ipek Williamson
The knowledge and wisdom, that I’ve accumulated, transformed me into; an Insight Coach, a Blogger, and an Active “Listener” with an ear for anyone who needs to be heard, passion to help, anyone, and any relationship that needs healing and improvement. Especially the relationship with ones’ self. The person that I am today is also the product of my 20 years of experience as an Executive Assistant for the top managers of several companies. I am the culmination of life experiences as a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, and colleague. I am also an avid reader and a lifelong learner. Life takes us to places that we don’t expect to end up, but always with a purpose. Last few years, I have made my goal to make my life better, to become happier and healthier. That goal triggered a desire to learn and share anything and everything that helps to make others happy too. Life is beautiful, and we all deserve to live it to the fullest, that’s why I’m here, to touch the lives of as many people as possible, one beautiful soul at a time, and help them to become the best version of themselves

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  1. This is such a simple yet POWERFUL equation Ipek = “Service = Joy + Wealth + Abundance”.
    I believe we sometimes define service as something that requires a lot of our time and energy, when in fact it really does not.
    Thank you for breaking it down to tangible yet easy actions we can all take – every day. #ichoosejoy