In accounting, a balance sheet is the core of accounting. A balance sheet is a financial statement that reports a company’s assets, liabilities, and shareholder equity.
I find the same sheet applied to human relations. Two people in relations and a third party representing the shareholders’ equity replace the triad of assets, liabilities and shareholders’ equity.
This is consistent with the scientific fact that there is no strong relationship between two parties as it is stronger through a third one that couples the two parties. For example, a wife and husband their relationship strengthen usually by having a third party- the children in this case.
This is also in accordance with Heider’s Balanced Theory I psychology. This theory states that the reactions of each individual are framed within a triangle that Heider called the P-O-X model. The triad consists of
P = the person to analyze
O = other, or the comparison person
X = the third element for comparisons such as a third person, a physical object, an idea, or an event.
Human Relationship Is More Complex than a Balanced Sheet
Human relationship is more complex than those we encounter on a balance sheet. This is because one must have balanced relations with self to have one with others.
Let us go back to the wife-husband relationship. If the husband lacks self-balance of health, heat, and mind, would he be able to have one with his wife and his kids? The answer is no.
The imbalance in one person may cause an imbalance in other people. A recent crime serves as a good example. A husband wanted to remarry his divorcee. She refused. He lost self-balance and decided to take revenge. He knew of his divorcee’s love to their only son. He killed the son just to bleed her heart.
The imbalance in the life of one person can have a rippling effect beyond imagination.
There is no balance in the relationship between two people without being open to each other and keeping the communication line between them. If not, what starts as a small gap of difference allows this gap to grow. A gap is a weakness that allows the relationship to deteriorate and ends up in saddening acts. The story of the father who killed his son serves as an example.
Two people even though each might have self-balance shall not have a balanced relationship. To keep the balance there are conditions such as communicating with empathy, respecting boundaries, and balancing work-life.
The law of life is balance everywhere at all scales.
“If the husband lacks self-balance of health, heat, and mind, would he be able to have one with his wife and his kids? The answer is no.”
This is known as “emotional labor” for the other parties when we expect others to adjust to our foibles without doing out own best to mitigate them.
Spot on Charlotte and you are very wise. I agree entirely with you
Fairness of dynamics between two people to build a healthy relationship. I agree with you without reservation, Aldo.
Balance applies to our body, mind and emotions, at every level of our being.
Entering into a relationship with another person means establishing a relational balance. Family, couple and business dynamics are based on balances and expectations that tend to persist over time.
I believe that balance in a relationship is best achieved when this does not in some way determine the renunciation of one’s individuality.