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Awareness

Flying… it’s not my favorite. It’s probably the only time I wish I was still drinking… I used to say I “liked to be passed out by takeoff.”

Yesterday, when I was flying, Martin suggested that I spend some time observing my anxiety instead of letting it overtake me. I was thinking this would never be possible for me, but as we were taxiing to the runway, I turned on this Ram Dass meditation recommended to me last week. It was originally recorded in 1994 with ambient accompaniment by Boreta and Superposition. Here’s the link to it on YouTube, Apple, and Spotify. It’s very beautifully put together, and it takes you on a journey of being the awareness of all that is, not too tightly identifying with it.

Let the phenomena of life arise, exist, and then change. Thoughts arise. Memories. Judgments. Plans. See them just like the horns, the traffic, the sensations in your body. They come. They exist. And then they move on.

We don’t attach our eyes to a leaf as it blows by. Why then do we linger in the thoughts of fear, and anxiety? We hear a horn and then don’t attach to it for hours. It arises, exists, and then moves on.

I’ll often grasp an idea of what may happen, and I OBSERVED myself on this plane fighting to let it go.

You can experience fear and anxiety without identifying with it, so long as you notice it, let it exist, and let it pass. Far too often, we don’t. We fall into the hole of “what was” or “what could be.” All fictitious realities created by the mind.

I had an actual mental fight about letting the anxiety, the worry, just exist and then pass.

“BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING DOES HAPPEN…”

I chose to keep listening to this meditation and was mindful to simply see myself as awareness. Moments later, thoughts later, the anxiety was gone without a second thought. (Don’t get me wrong- it still tried to creep back, but it wasn’t nearly as incapacitating as it normally is.)

Flying is kind of an irrational fear. It truly is the safest way to travel. However, we do this for so many different things in our lives.

For example, we do this with people who have hurt us. We KNOW that to let it go is the way through, but we feel vindicated in lingering in the anger.

We do this with our being “correct,” with our model of the world being the “right” model.

We do this with expectations of friends and lovers.

We expect every person to be in the next moment the same as they’ve been in the previous.

When we feel upset, we relive it. A fight with your boss that happened, for example, might be replayed 17 times to every person who will listen.

You had a fight with someone in the grocery store? How many people heard about that? Fight with a spouse? Did you call everyone and replay the who what when why and where? Over and over? Living in a moment that isn’t now? Replaying it in your head?

Your subconscious mind doesn’t understand future tense. It only knows now, and now arises, exists, and then moves on.

The meditation was very useful in helping me with this particular anxiety. I listened to it from pushback through takeoff (lucky me, the 17-minute meditation took me from the gate to 10,000 feet. That’s not always the case flying out of LaGuardia. 😂)

I recommend it! Might help if anxiety is one of the things you struggle with.

Andee Scarantino
Andee Scarantinohttp://getthefuckoff.com
Andee Scarantino is a Mindset and Transformational coach on a mission to make personal development digestible. She is the creator of getthefuckoff.com, and host of The Get the F*ck Off Podcast, which deep dives into identity, limiting beliefs, and “getting the fuck off the shit that doesn’t serve you anymore.”  Andee earned her M.A. in Sociology from Columbia University in 2013. Her work incorporates how macro-level systems contribute to individual arrested development. Since a very young age, she has always had a fascination for knowing and understanding people. She spent 20 years working in the food, beverage, and hospitality industry; 11 of those years were at a restaurant in Times Square. Through that time, both while bartending and training staff members, she honed the incredible skill of active listening. Now, Andee uses her powerful voice to connect to the “greater story of us,” showing readers and listeners alike how so much of our human experience is dictated to us by things outside of our awareness. Andee is the creator and leader of a women’s coaching community, “Day 1.” The community is based on the concept that everything happens now. One of her members described it as a “beautifully powerful container full of trust, vulnerability, laughs, a few cuss words, and a whole lot of exploration.” Present moment awareness is a major component of Andee’s mindset and transformational coaching, and she’s diligent in having her clients examine their stories in between sessions. Day 1. is a reminder that every day, every moment, is an opportunity for a fresh start. Who you are today is not contingent on yesterday. A former 18-year cigarette smoker, Andee now is an avid runner and has run many full marathons since 2018. Quitting smoking was the fulcrum that shifted her understanding of how perceived identity contributes to people staying in what they believe are unmovable scenarios. Andee lives in New York City. In her free time, she enjoys running by the East River.

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CONVERSATIONS

  1. Hello Ande, just scrolled through the writers of the weeks articles and your title caught my eye especially as I read a little of the article before clicking in for entire read, and saw the word flying. Then I understood. I use to be afraid of flying and I know that is not what your article is focusing on, but I had to overcome that anxiety. For me, I now carry my Women’s Devotional Bible and randomly flip open to begin reading whatever pops up. I keep my journal nearby and will also begin to write down my thoughts. I still will have a glass of wine but not like I use to, needing 3-4 before boarding. I understand.

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