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Are You Ready?

You were born into a society that comes with many pre-installed programs. One of which being “you need to be successful for people to like you.” It starts right at primary school, if not earlier. You immediately begin comparing your progress with the kid sitting next to you. “His writing is neater than mine, and she reads faster than I do. My parents will be disappointed.”

It all starts like this and snowballs from there. And before you know it, you find yourself fallen into the clutches of constant people-pleasing. Consequently, when you grow up, you feel that a thriving business, a marriage that looks wonderful to an outsider, a spotless career that goes only up and higher means you’re going to be approved and liked.

You feel like somethings are not right, but giving up and starting again would mean people you love will see you as a failure, which is a double-edged sword that cuts deep. On one side, there’s your personal and/or professional reputation, on the other, your happiness.

Choices, with a capital C

It’s hard to get rid of the program that was firmly pierced into your personality since the day you were born. But think this way; if you’re not happy, how can you give happiness to anyone else? How can you continue living the way you do, knowing that it’s making the emptiness in you bigger and bigger?

At some point, you have to make the hard choice and replace that program with the “follow what makes me happy and don’t worry about what others think.” And believe me, the sooner you make your choice, the sooner you’ll experience the biggest and best feeling of relief in the world.

Because by doing that, you release yourself from the tight ropes of constant people-pleasing, living the life for others, doing things, and making decisions to feel loved, accepted, and preferred.

Do you need to let go of some people in your life who’s opinions of your life path are affecting how you show up each day?

o be it. And actually, you don’t even need to let them go. You only need to permit yourself not to worry about what they think of you. It might be one of the hardest things to do, but you’ll see that it’s also the most rewarding journey.​

Now ask yourself;

  • Are you aware of people that are holding you back from the things that you really want in your life?
  • Do you worry about what other people think of your choices?
  • Would you make different choices if you could let go of what other people think of you?

If one or more of your answers to these questions is YES, do something about it. Because time is ticking away, and not even a second will be back to you. Bite the bullet, make your choice and go for it. You can do it. You will do it.

Ipek Williamson
Ipek Williamsonhttps://ipekwilliamsoncoaching.com/
The knowledge and wisdom, that I’ve accumulated, transformed me into; an Insight Coach, a Blogger, and an Active “Listener” with an ear for anyone who needs to be heard, passion to help, anyone, and any relationship that needs healing and improvement. Especially the relationship with ones’ self. The person that I am today is also the product of my 20 years of experience as an Executive Assistant for the top managers of several companies. I am the culmination of life experiences as a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, and colleague. I am also an avid reader and a lifelong learner. Life takes us to places that we don’t expect to end up, but always with a purpose. Last few years, I have made my goal to make my life better, to become happier and healthier. That goal triggered a desire to learn and share anything and everything that helps to make others happy too. Life is beautiful, and we all deserve to live it to the fullest, that’s why I’m here, to touch the lives of as many people as possible, one beautiful soul at a time, and help them to become the best version of themselves

6 COMMENTS

  1. Ipek,
    This is truly thought provoking.
    In my experience, I had to ‘grow’ into this thinking. It was so much harder when I was younger and even in my 40’s. Trying to secure my space in the world raising children. Is it possible to have this kind of raw courage to let go when we are younger? I love that I am sitting with the question…Always enjoy your written words! #iamready

    • I am right there with you, Carolyn. In my younger years, my main concern was being a wonderful people-pleaser. Didn’t mind being thrown at walls by others, left and right. Later in my life, I have realized that I need to leave behind the people and their opinions if they don’t match with my vibration level. Don’t get me wrong, I gave each person the benefit of the doubt, tolerated more than a few times their negativity or malicious approach, but within a limit. It wasn’t easy to put myself first. Is it possible to have the wisdom and courage or even the awareness at a younger age? I think it is but not for the majority of people, in my opinion. Thank you for coming up with this question that made me think and reflect too.

  2. Each person is constantly subjected to judgments of any kind. And, on the other hand, each of us should be allowed to explore, making mistakes, becoming aware of the automatic mechanism that makes us doubt whether what we do can be accepted by everyone. This awareness must make us understand that people’s reaction is something that we cannot keep under control, as well as many other factors. Let us concentrate on the way to give our best, to aim at the maximum respect for our possibilities, always referring to our strongest values.
    Of course, we can always improve ourselves and these feedbacks (not judgments !!) will be very useful for us to do so. But let’s do it for ourselves, not to please others.
    In the end, if we think about it, the judgment is nothing more than the desire on the part of those who express it to change us as they would like we were. He never has the purpose of pushing us to become the person we want to be.

    • Judgements are and will always be a part of our lives, indeed, Aldo. Taking them to heart and feeling offended by them is a choice, so is using them as an opportunity to process and understand our thought processes and actions.
      On the other hand, all judgment stems from the desire to change the other party. From the idea of bringing them to a more acceptable point – but for whom? For the judge or for the party who’s judged? Of course for the judge.
      We can choose to consider the judgment as data to consider and explore further objectively or we can let it hurt us. If we want to improve things, a conscientious approach should be the preferred path.

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