There are things on which we can exercise what is in our power but many others on which we cannot or are not always able to impress our action.

When events occur with respect to which we can do something, the only thing that can be done is to act. If there is a problem, there is also its solution. As long as we are mulling over why it happened to us, nothing changes.

But when events occur in front of which we can do nothing, all that remains is acceptance.

Contrary to what one might think, acceptance is anything but a passive attitude. It means being able to evaluate what it is really in our possibilities to do to solve a problem, in the absence of other help. Sometimes accepting, looking at what troubles us,  “familiarize” with the problem, puts us in a position to embrace the true understanding of how things are. Accepting is also learning to understand when a situation is irreversible when we can’t do much to change things, but we can definitely do a lot to change the way we live those things.

Acceptance is a practical strategy. It is an attitude, a state of mind that allows us to deal with the difficult things that happen to us and that we cannot change but it is better to try to understand. It is a way to change how we feel, changing what we think and how we react to situations.

When we are not limited or influenced by what irritates us, we can see the situation we are experiencing more clearly and can find solutions in a more creative, balanced, and flexible way.

There are situations that we have to accept simply because we are unable to change them. When we don’t accept them, they turn into an obstacle that steals our energy. The real miracle happens when we accept them, as during this process of apparent surrender we grow and move on. If we will give space only to frustration and start complaining, we will remain stuck in our path, we cannot even perceive possible solutions and opportunities that maybe we have escaped.

Not accepting a fact means closing yourself off to opportunities, choosing to stay in the past.

Of course, it is not about relativizing everything or staying silent. When we don’t like a situation or it becomes an obstacle to achieving our goals, we must try to change it, but if we are unable to do so, continually bumping into the wall will only hurt us. If we can’t break down that wall it’s best to learn how to exploit it.

To achieve this, it is important to understand that everything depends on the interpretation, which is determined by our experiences, expectations, and emotions that hold us back and condition us.

However, what we are seeing is not the only reality, but only one aspect of it. Our reaction to the situation will be the final version. Therefore, we must focus on finding solutions, not complain. Remembering that life is not what one wants it to be, very often it is capricious and unpredictable. It will continue to put problems in our path but also new opportunities. We are the ones who choose if we want to be victims or if we prefer to take the reins and learn every step we take.

After all, nothing is forever. If we don’t like something, we can try to change it; if this is not possible, we can only change our attitude.

Simple common sense tells us that we must learn to embrace life with all that it entails.

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Aldo Delli Paoli
Aldo Delli Paoli
Aldo is a lawyer and teacher of law & Economic Sciences, "lent" to the finance world. He has worked, in fact, 35 years long for a multinational company of financial service in the auto sector, where he held various roles, until that of CEO. In the corporate field, he has acquired skills and held positions as Credit Manager, Human Resource Manager, Team leader for projects of Acquisition & Merger, branch opening, company restructuring, outplacement, legal compliance, analysis and innovation of organizational processes, business partnerships, relations with Trade Unions and Financial Control Institutions. After leaving the company, he continued as an external member of the Board of Directors e, at the same time, he has gone back practicing law and was a management consultant for various companies. He has been also a columnist for newspapers specializing in labor law, automotive services and work organization. His interests include human behavior in the organizational environment, to the neuroscience, the impact of new technologies, the fate of the planet and people facing poverty or war scenarios. He loves traveling, reading, is passionate about many sports, follows the NBA and practices tennis.