So many times, we hear about people who turn to alcohol and drugs to mask pain. Sometimes even the person engulfed in the wanted or unwanted behavior doesn’t know what brought them to the dependency of the ever-so-powerful mind-altering crutches. But one thing is for certain is that it sometimes takes a life-changing event to pull the mind together long enough to start to understand what has really been happening.
We have to understand addiction is hard to control. It’s a disease that sometimes has ties to friends and families who are or at one time also had dependency problems. What may seem like ‘fun’ with people becomes a black hole, which is hard to crawl out of alone and without help.
Below is a poem I received of someone who had hit rock bottom in their life and was able to turn things around for not only herself but for the life of her baby girl. She allowed me to share a very surreal moment in her life that was the catalyst to change her life. Her hope in sharing her thoughts, as she described, the hardest time in her life, would in some way help someone else who is in the deep throes of addiction to know there is a way to break free.
I thought I knew pain before
But that was just the beginning
I’ve finally found what I love more
And that’s a life that is worth living
I can’t be ashamed of my past mistakes
They’ve made me who I am today
It’s amazing waking up without the shakes
For so long for this, I’ve prayed
The journey I’m on isn’t over yet
I’ve got a long road to travel still
But, I’m gonna make it this time, I won’t forget
I know there’s a way, and I have the will
For all the wrongs I’ve done
This time I’ve learned the most
I’ve realized I’m not the only one
And I need to hold my family close
Addition can be so very cunning
I’ve lost most everything I loved
I thought I could get away by running
I really need help from the man above
All of the people I thought were friends to me
It turns out I was just there to be used
They were just as good to me as an enemy
I was the nice one, the only one they could abuse
Four long months later I’m clean and sober
It’s crazy what you learn in this small cell
I can say that old life is done and over
I am tired of the life that was a living hell
So, I’m starting fresh, just my daughter and me
No drug or drink will stop me now
Nothing means more than her and my sobriety
I’ll show everyone just how
If you don’t believe me, I’ll understand why
But just watch me and you will see
I understand I used to lie
But today that just isn’t me
The poem is very raw and tells a lot of the feeling of loneliness and realization of a life gone astray. But I am very proud of how she was able to pull herself up and walk proud. Challenges ahead? I am sure the first battle is realizing the problem, but the struggle is typically a lifetime battle.
Remember, it’s easy to wake up and feel horrible and think you can control the urge. You want to move forward that day and just stop. But, when you feel you only have to ‘slow down,’ it will forever rule your body and your mind. Please take the time to get help. You are worth the life you deserve.
Please call the addiction National helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of the publisher or any entity whatsoever for which the author is affiliated.
Thank you for this meaningful article about addiction and for sharing that young woman’s poem, Robin. My own life was turned upside down by a member of my family who struggled with addiction-almost died twice. He’s flourishing now. One of his epiphanies was that he wasn’t a F-up but that he had done F-ed up behaviors. Indeed. His story of transformation inspires me deeply as he took on the challenge of the mental patterns that were behind his addiction. I believe many people are impacted by other people’s addictions and that with support lives can be saved. Each person must choose that path for him or herself, however, as a first step-choose their life. The deep internal work remains essential and profound. Breaking free of often ancestral patterns of mental, emotional illness, and addiction remains a huge challenge and opportunity for humanity.
Robin, this piece could change someone’s life – of that I’m absolutely certain. Thank you for putting it out into the world.
Thank you Kimberly for reading the article. It was profound for me as well and I do hope this will help someone struggling. If the article can help save one, then it was well worth the effort.
Having worked with children who are affected by the addiction of their parents, this one really hits home for me. The disease is neither kind nor forgiving and the ripples travel far. Thank you for sharing this, Robin!
Thank you Melissa for your work with children affected by addiction. You are so right how unforgiving this disease really is….my only hope this article will reach someone who needs help.
By now everyone knows that addiction is a process through which, initially, a behavior is produced which can have the function of providing pleasure and alleviating an internal malaise. Subsequently, it is characterized by a constant failure of its control and its persistence, despite the negative consequences it produces.
The person, by becoming addicted, loses control over his own life and, although he wishes to get out of it, the attempts he makes in this sense are mostly unsuccessful.
And now even teenagers know this but the spread of this evil has no limits, involving more and more young people in age.
I can therefore understand how much courage and determination a person who wants to get out of it must find.
I love redemption stories
Won’t you help to sing
These songs of freedom?
‘Cause all I ever had
All I ever had
These songs of freedom
Songs of freedom
Songwriters: Bob Marley
Thank you so much for your insight. It’s such a horrible road for one to take. Getting out is almost impossible. I appreciate your comments. You are spot on!! Robin
Beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing. Robin