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5 Regrets of the Dying

Trigger warning, #death is referenced in this post.

Have you read the 5 regrets of the dying by Bronnie Ware? A nod to my good friend and inspiration Laura Izard who introduced me to this book a few years ago. I invite you to take a look at this link and see yourself, within your current life, in any of the regrets.

Note: You can find a video version of this blog at the bottom of this post.

If today was your last day, how many of these regrets would you have as you exit the world in your current form?

My regrets

No 1, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me” is the one regret that I continue to work on, having already done a lot of work on 3 in particular over the past 6 years. For me, it is more about the ‘not living a life true to myself’, less about a life expected by others as I do not have that issue.

I still hold myself back at times from showing up and speaking my truth, maybe because that truth is still finding its way to the surface, maybe because I am afraid of becoming that whole person that I know is possible and the impact that could come with that.

In fact, Kim Ingelby, high-performance coach and awesome human being shared a quote during our previous value through Vulnerability podcast that is really resonating in my torso, in my neck, in my whole head LITERALLY as I type these words on 23rd Sept 2021, “most people I work with are scared of failing but they are way more scared of succeeding, so they are kind of in the middle.”

The potential within all of us

After over £20,000 invested in a range of personal development activities over the past 6 years including coaching, online summits, HR qualifications in OD, L&D, and more, I can confirm that one of the best investments I have made, in my life, was securing the help of what I call a spiritual or you may say energetic guide, someone that could help me not only with my thinking and personal journey towards increased systemic awareness, but also how to feel into my body, what different parts of my body are telling me, how my natural ebbs and flows emerge and what they are telling me, and more.

I am holding back from sharing this person’s name today as I have not sought consent to share as yet, but need to share this blog as it is flowing out.

I work within the chemicals industry, I love human beings and nature, and adore my family and hold a deep-seated belief in the unlimited potential in every one of us and every single thing. Yet there is a tension.

How can I love nature AND work in one of the most extractive industries on the planet?

What is my work to do by navigating this tension and systemic leverage point with the privilege that I hold?

Maybe there is a new regret for me surfacing

As I write this blog there is a potential regret emerging, linked to not living a life true to myself, but more around not amplifying the voices and experiences, in my own way, of the oppressed, many of whom are currently going unheard.

Why should I care sitting here in the privileged West?

Because I am increasingly FEELING that pain within myself and especially the impact of the very industry that is causing widespread harm on the interconnected ecosystems and which pays my salary and pension. This started following the murder of George Floyd, the first time I felt, deeply, another human’s pain from halfway across the world. I cried repeatedly for 3 days, yet he was not the first human to be oppressed this way and sadly he will not be the last.

Yet this took place in the so-called developed ‘West.’

What we do not see and hear, those voices that are often going unheard, voices that are amplified via amazing movements such as Amazon Frontlines, A Growing Culture, and others. Maybe this is why the incredible Sahana Chattopadhyay has emerged so powerfully in my world over the past months, an ex-corporate leader based in India who today is a writer, speaker, and facilitator of truly regenerative approaches.

She has helped me question and sense in new ways, such as can be found here at our first ever co-authored blog, I really hope more of these will follow.

No regrets!

Weirdly and this has popped up many times over the past 6 weeks, I am not afraid of dying. I hope that it doesn’t come too soon, but I am not afraid of it.

What I will never regret is asking for help, both unpaid through contributing to and gaining from multiple amazing communities of global open-hearted change-makers and paradigm-pushers, and also investing in ME.

  • I will never regret knowing I was worthy of investment.
  • I will never regret trying to find my voice and speaking up and taking action beyond my corporate job role and title.
  • I will never regret suppressing emotion for over 20 years, it was part of the process.
  • I will never regret working ‘too hard.’
  • I will never regret not staying in touch with friends.
  • I will never regret that I wish I allowed myself to be happier.

What may you regret if you don’t put YOU, the inside-out you, first at this time?

Fancy chatting?

Why not visit www.hexochangenow.com and/or set up a meet and greet call here, if any of this resonates and I can hold space to learn more about you and your work for 20 mins, I have limited slots on Thurs and Fri afternoon.

I really wish you to have no regrets when that day comes. x

Garry Turner
Garry Turnerhttps://www.hexochangenow.com/
Combining a powerful mix of international sales and culture expertise, Garry is facilitating individual and team transformations as an interpersonal catalyst. With over 20 years of sales and relationship building experience and qualified in organisational design and development, learning & development and as a chartered member of the CIPD, he focuses on bringing intentional human-centred working to all walks of life, and has the evidence to validate this necessary paradigm shift. Whether through connection-centred workshops, keynote talks, live events or through Thinking Partnerships, Garry is driven by his two non-negotiable core values of growth and connection.

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